Although many people say, "marriage is just a piece of paper that doesn't really change a relationship," as a premarital counselor (and long married person) I often smile to myself when I hear this.

What I've found to be true is that becoming engaged to marry most definitely does change a relationship, often in positive ways. Engagement also affords thoughtful couples opportunities to build their relationship's strengths, as well as take proactive action to prevent possible relationship problems in the future.

On this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm speaking with expert premarital counselor Rachel Harder about the changes that happen in a relationship once couples get engaged, plus the skills and strategies that she teaches her premarital couples to help set them up for success.

If you're recently engaged, want to be, or know someone who is, listen to our interview to hear about the most important domains of your relationship to focus on in order to build the foundation for a happy, successful and satisfying marriage.

And, CONGRATULATIONS!

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby, LMFT and Rachel Harder, M.A., LMFT-C

www.growingself.com

Foundational Relationship Skills

• Self awareness -How understanding yourself, your needs, your feelings and your personal values can help you build better relationships with others.
• Emotional regulation -How being able to manage your feelings can help you communicate more effectively in relationships.
• Self respect -How having healthy self-esteem and self-love helps you have stronger and more authentic relationships.
• Assertiveness -How to develop your voice and your truth in order to communicate your needs, rights and feelings to others.

Intermediate Relationship Skills

• How to improve your communication skillsby cultivating both self-expression skills as well as listening skills.
• Setting boundaries -How to set appropriate and healthy limits with others.
• How to manage conflict.

Advanced Communication Skills and Relationship Skills

• Identifying our triggers -How to use our self-awareness, self-respect, and communication skills to avoid situations that would be bad for us and bad for our relationships.
• Empathy -Learning how to understand the needs, rights, feelings and perspectives of others, and how to use that awareness to improve communication and build better relationships.
• How to cope with relationship challengesincluding dealing with toxic people, how to deal with criticism, and what to do with bullies.

We sincerely hope that this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast helps to give you some direction for building better relationships in your life!

xo,
Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby and Kathleen Carroll Stutts, M. Ed., LPC

www.growingself.com

Advice From a Life Coach: Here we are, just a week into the new year. If you're like many people, your track record on those resolutions may already be spotty. Or perhaps you've tossed the whole plan out the window already.

Fear not: Making changes is not about doing the thing perfectly every time. You don't just hop in a car, point the steering wheel in the general direction of the grocery store, and then expect to get there do you? Of course not. From the moment you pull out of the driveway you're turning, speeding up, slowing down, taking detours, stopping for gas — you adjust and flex the whole way there.

BUT. That's not to say that it isn't helpful to have tools and strategies to help you along the way. Just like you use your handy Google Map App to get you from A-Z, there are many useful tricks and life-hacks to make doing what you want to do easier than it would be if you just wandered out without a map.

Particularly if your goals for the new year involve creating a new keystone habit, and making it stick, there's an easy way and a hard way. Here at Growing Self, we're all about making growth and success as simple and painless as possible. So, here's a bonus episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast to support you on your journey.

I'll be discussing:

• Useful apps and practical strategies to keep you on track
• Psychological strategies to keep you motivated.
• The mindsets that will lead you towards success... and the ones that will send you skidding off the rails
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You can do this!

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

www.growingself.com

I want you to be successful at creating the change you desire in this new year. So for that reason, today's episode is all about how to find and lovingly cultivate one solid keystone habit.

This surprisingly simple technique launches a chain of successes that will carry you forward. Join me and learn how to make great things happen — the easy way!

With love,

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

www.GrowingSelf.com