Smart couples recognize that pregnancy is more than a growing-a-baby waiting game. It is a prime opportunity to work through important relationship issues and strengthen your relationship.

Having a baby can feel like it’s the Pregnant Lady Show, rather than an experience that you and your partner are working through together. But the journey of pregnancy, and the challenges it offers, are opportunities for growth — for both of you. 

Using these moments during pregnancy will help you know how to work as a team, improve your communication, increase your emotional intimacy, support your emotional wellbeing, and lay the foundation for the happy, healthy family life you want for yourselves and your child... but only if you know how.

This episode is going to teach you how to turn the pregnancy into a positive relationship growth experience, by navigating the pregnancy experience as a team. My guests D’Anthony and Rachel Ward are experts on this subject, and today they're sharing their wisdom with you.

Join us!

Xoxo, 

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

GrowingSelf.com

PS: I have so much more to support you and your family in my "Happy Families" content collection. Tap in to find expert advice from the marriage and family therapists and parenting coaches on my team, as well as curated podcast playlists just for you. 

Getting into couples counseling is a fantastic idea... but you have to know how to engage with the process in order to have a good experience. Unfortunately, it's very easy to make one or more of the super common mistakes that can sabotage couples counseling. 

I hope this episode helps you avoid that outcome, and get the help for your relationship you need and deserve. My guest is Jenna P., a marriage counselor and relationship coach on our team at Growing Self. She’s sharing her perspective on the seven things that can sabotage couples counseling, and how to have an experience in counseling that truly benefits you and your relationship. 

I hope you’ll join us. 

Xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby 

growingself.com

P.S. — For more advice on improving your relationship, check out our “Relationship Repair” collection of articles and podcasts. 

Was that just a nasty fight? Or a sign that your relationship is failing? 

As a longtime marriage counselor, I know that it can be hard to spot the difference. Some forms of conflict are healthy and even beneficial for relationships, while others are a signal that your emotional bond is on the rocks. You can prevent a breakup or divorce and keep your connection healthy and strong by learning what a failing relationship really looks like — and what you should be doing right now if your relationship is in trouble. 

I hope this episode arms you with all the info you need to make important decisions for your relationship. Join me!

xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

P.S. — For more advice on navigating conflict in a way that helps your relationship grow, check out our “Communication that Connects” collection of articles and podcasts. 

Over the past few decades, we’ve made some huge strides toward building equality in our relationships. It’s no longer rare for a woman to be her family’s primary breadwinner, or to see a dad perusing the produce aisle with a Baby Bjorn strapped to his chest. 

Yet, for many couples who arrive in couples counseling or relationship coaching, the division of household labor is still a perennial source of conflict and resentment. Many couples still fall into traditional gender roles when it comes to who’s doing the cleaning, the cooking, and the shopping, even though it’s now the norm for both partners to work full-time. 

Furthermore, tasks or roles associated with “women’s work” are often viewed as being less valuable and important than activities associated with traditional male roles. Even relationships between career-focused women and stay-at-home dads can have issues with power imbalances and inequality because we value these types of work differently based on our attitudes about gender.

Relationships that feel imbalanced and unfair are not only bad for the partner who’s doing most of the daily household tasks. They’re bad for the relationship itself, and for both partners inside of it. Becoming truly equal partners is often the path to creating a happier, more connected, and more fulfilling relationship (and, interestingly, a better sex life), and that’s what we’re discussing on today’s episode of the podcast. 

My guest is Kate Mangino, a gender expert, speaker, and the author of “Equal Partners: Improving Gender Equality at Home.” Kate is sharing wisdom from her extensive social science research, her two decades of work within the international development sector, as well her own life and relationship, to help you find more balance and create a truly equal partnership that feels fair and fulfilling. 

I hope you’ll tune in to this important conversation on equality in relationships, which not only applies to heterosexual couples, but to anyone who has some internalized gender scripts to interrogate (in other words, everyone!)

With love, 

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

www.GrowingSelf.com

What is your apology language? And, more importantly… what’s your partner’s? 

As an experienced marriage counselor and couples therapist, I know that apologizing is an essential skill for healthy relationships. 

But not all apologies are created equal. Just as partners must learn to speak each other’s love languages to help each other feel cared for, they must also learn to apologize in ways that feel meaningful to their partner and pave the way to genuine forgiveness.

Tune in to learn all about apology languages, the anatomy of a good apology, and how you can repair “relationship injuries” and get things back on track with the people you love the most. 

Xoxo, 

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

On today’s episode of the podcast, we’re covering a topic that doesn’t get nearly the attention it deserves: the unique challenges of maintaining a relationship when you or your partner are members of the military, and how you can keep your military relationship healthy and strong. 

If you or your partner (or both of you!) are service members, you know that the military can feel like a mistress, always meddling on the edges of your relationship… and sometimes high-jacking it completely. No matter how in love with each other you are, or how committed to your partnership you feel, it’s hard to be moved from place to place because of distant orders that you had little or no say in. It’s hard to have a career that takes you away from your partner and your children for extended periods of time. It’s hard to take care of everything on the home front by yourself, especially if you’re stationed far away from family and friends. 

And it can be especially hard to find a marriage counselor or a long-distance relationship counselor who understands these unique challenges, and how to help military couples overcome them. Luckily, we have just such an expert joining us on this episode of the podcast. Jesse S., M.S, LMFT, is a marriage counselor and relationship coach here at Growing Self. He’s also a member of the military with over two decades of service, currently serving in the Connecticut National Guard as a First Sergeant in the 141st Ground Ambulance Unit. In addition to treating bodily wounds, he’s passionate about helping other service members heal and grow as individuals, and within their relationships. Today, he’s sharing his insight and guidance with you. I hope you’ll join us!

With love, 

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

Discovering that your partner has cheated is one of the most painful experiences anyone can have. It’s a form of relational trauma that leaves you hurting and mistrustful, long after the affair has ended. Healing from this form of betrayal is a difficult process that takes many months or even years. But the partner who cheated has their own healing to do, and that very real need is often overlooked in conversations about infidelity. 

So you’ve cheated, now what? If you’ve cheated on someone you love and care about, you may be questioning everything you thought you knew about yourself. You may feel confused about how you got here, and conflicted about the future you want. You are likely filled with a complex mix of painful feelings, like regret, shame, guilt, and ambivalence. Addressing those feelings and understanding your experience is the path to repair, both for you, and for your relationship. 

That’s why I created this episode of the podcast. I hope this helps you find space for your own healing and growth, so you can move forward from this experience stronger than before. 

With love, 
Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

GrowingSelf.com

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Episode Highlights

[01:50] Help! I Cheated

[7:01] Why Did I Cheat?

[15:03] Moving Forward After Cheating

[31:21] Forgiving Yourself

[39:20] A Healthy Healing Process After Cheating

No matter how secure your relationship is otherwise, it hurts when you feel sexually rejected by your partner. That’s because sexuality is vulnerable and often bound up with our feelings of love, and worthiness — particularly if one of your top love languages is physical touch.

Every long-term relationship involves some ebbs and flows in sexual desire, but how you manage those fluctuations matters — especially if you're feeling hurt, or resentful. To help you approach these conversations with vulnerability, empathy, courage, and grace, I’ve invited my colleague Dori B. to join me on this podcast episode. 

Dori is a certified sex therapist and couples counselor here at Growing Self, and she’s helped countless couples navigate differences in sexual desire, while building even better relationships in the process. Today, she’s sharing her wisdom and guidance with you. 

I hope you’ll join us for her warm, actionable advice about handling hurt feelings related to sex, and getting back in synch with your partner.

Xoxo, 

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby 
www.GrowingSelf.com

We all dream of having a close, connected relationship that fulfills us on every level. If you're feeling lonely in a relationship, it hurts. It can be hard to know how to reconnect, especially if the distance has been growing for a while — or if negativity has crept in.

Deep connection is created through the intentional cultivation of emotional intimacy. In this episode, we’re exploring how to do that, so you can create the loving, satisfying relationship you want and deserve.

With love to you both, 

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

GrowingSelf.com

Was that a compliment, or a jab? Did they really “not see” your text, or are they punishing you? On this episode of the podcast, we’re talking about how to deal with passive-aggressive people, so you can stand up for yourself with compassion and confidence. 

With love, 

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

GrowingSelf.com

Secret spending or hidden debts are a unique type of infidelity that is not often discussed. This kind of financial betrayal creates major relationship issues, and takes a special healing process to mend.

Fortunately, it is possible to save your marriage after financial infidelity, and to come through it together, stronger and more solvent than ever before. In this episode of the podcast, I’m discussing how to heal after financial infidelity, with an expert in financial counseling for couples.

I hope you listen, or share this episode with someone in your life who should! 

xo, 

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

GrowingSelf.com

Are crushes innocent, or on-ramps to an affair? Can you be "friends" with someone you have a crush on, without risking your relationship? What should you do when you're married, but have a crush on someone else? Oh, the questions!

It happens: people in happy, healthy, committed relationships can still develop crushes on others. However, smart, self-aware people in committed relationships need to not follow those feelings, but rather handle them maturely and with wisdom. 

What To Do (And Not Do) When You Are Married And Have a Crush

Today on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm talking all about how to handle yourself and your relationship when you have a crush on someone else. We'll be discussing:

• The mechanics of a crush; how and why crushes develop
• The difference between a crush and a platonic friendship
• Why happy, committed married people can have crushes on others
• How crushes can turn into something more serious
• How to use self awareness, integrity, and honesty to protect your marriage
• How to use your crush experience in order to add energy and intimacy into your relationship
• Warning signs that your crush is developing into something else
• Why extramarital affairs are always a bad idea, and rarely end well
• How to stop having a crush on someone else
• How to avoid embarrassment and professional ruin if you have a crush on a coworker
• How to protect your relationship and stay true to your values even when you're having feelings for another.

All this and more on today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast.

xoxo,

Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

GrowingSelf.com

Ps: If you're worried that your partner may have a crush on someone else, here are some other resources for you: Signs of an Emotional Affair,and How to Get Your Needs Met in a Relationship. You can also play this episode in the car with your partner and see what they'd like to share... LMB