Mon, 20 April 2020
Intentional Living: Without and WithinOn this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast (as well as other episodes to come), I'm providing you with new ideas and growth activities that will help you move yourself forward on a deep level, while the world around us stops. To begin, I'm speaking with my dear Olivia, the mastermind behind Decluttered Intentions, about simple things you can do to:
I hope that these ideas and activities help YOU use this special, quiet time to move forward on your journey of growth. All the best, Ps: One of the resources I mentioned in this episode is my "What's Holding You Back" assessment, that gives you insight into your personal strengths and growth opportunities in a variety of domains. Text "GROW" to 55444 if you'd like to take it. xoxo, LMB
Direct download: INTENTIONAL_LIVING_AT_HOME_-_4720_3.51_PM.mp3
Category:How to, Self Improvement, Mental Health -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 13 April 2020
FINDING BALANCE: We want to have everything. We want and need to have rules and structure to protect us and guide our lives. Yet we also crave freedom and independence. We long to have empathy and compassion in our relationships,but we also want to be challenged so that we can grow. Finding Balance In All ThingsTight vs. Loose. Protective vs. Forgiving. Planning vs. Being Present. Everything we do exists on a continuum, a spectrum of finding balance between extremes so that we can create a healthy path on every level. Dr. Michele Gelfand is the author of "Rule Makers, Rule Breakers: How Tight and Loose Cultures Wire Our World," she's been on the stage of TedEx, she's been featured on The Hidden Brain podcast, and now she's here with me to share her wisdom with YOU. I hope her fascinating insights help you find a healthy balance in your life. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Finding_blalance_3_-_4820_9.06_AM.mp3
Category:How to, Self Improvement, Mental Health -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 6 April 2020
Let's face it: Couples and money is a hot-button issue for many relationships. Sooner or later, all successful long-term couples need to work together to figure out how to communicate productively about money so that they can get on the same page and create a shared financial future. This is not always easy under the best of circumstances. Now, many couples are facing financial uncertainty or even a financial crisis (thanks coronavirus). It's more important than ever to be working as a united team around finances so that your relationship stays strong and healthy... even if your bank account takes a hit. To help you have constructive, drama free conversations about money with your partner, I've invited my colleague Meagan Terry to give us the scoop on exactly what to do (and what NOT to do) in order to have loving, respectful, and effective conversations about finances that create unity and connection. Meagan is a highly experienced marriage counselor who has helped countless couples stop financial conflict and get on the same page around money. Now she's here for YOU. Listen, and get her actionable tips you can start using today! With love, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Money_and_Love-_Couple_Finances_-_4620_4.32_PM.mp3
Category:Self Improvement, Relationships, Mental Health -- posted at: 4:54pm MDT |
Mon, 30 March 2020
ADVICE FROM A CAREER COACH | In addition to everything else in your life being upended by the coronavirus pandemic, you probably have a slew of new "coronavirus career anxieties" in addition to the usual coronavirus anxiety that's buzzing inside everyone right now. Many people are very worried about their career future right now. Many jobs have been lost to coronavirus, and with the threat of recession, there may be more layoffs to come. (Read: Coping With a Layoff) For those among us lucky enough to have stable employment, we now figure out how to maintain our professionalism via online video meetings, work from home while balancing childcare, homeschooling and more. In times like these it's absolutely normal to be worried about work, and help is here. Advice From a Career CoachToday I've tapped a couple of my career coaching colleagues to discuss important questions like:
Join us for some timely coronavirus career advice on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Career_Coronavirus_Job_Loss_-_32920_11.59_AM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Career Development, Personal Growth -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 16 March 2020
Coronavirus anxiety? Struggling with the new reality of "Corona Life?" You're not alone. I recently polled some of my tribe on Instagram to see how they were doing mentally and emotionally during the Coronavirus crisis we are all experiencing together. In efforts to help you manage Coronavirus anxiety and cultivate emotional resilience, I am devoting this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast to addressing your questions about coping with "Coronavirus Life" in order to provide new ideas and direction. Specifically:
I'm answering these listener questions and sharing some special, free resources for my listeners (You!!) on this episode. I hope this discussion and the resources I'm sharing helps you find new coping skills, and practices that help build a firm foundation of emotional resilience inside yourself right now. Wishing you all the best,
Direct download: Coronavirus_Life-_How_to_Cope_-_31620_4.25_PM.mp3
Category:Self-Improvement, Mental Health, Relationships -- posted at: 5:21pm MDT |
Mon, 9 March 2020
Knowing how to handle inevitable issues that creep into every relationship makes all the difference in whether your relationship becomes stronger over time... or strained. The truth is that all couples need to learn "how" to do relationships, and there are a few core skills that are essential. My guests today are expert premarital counselors who are sharing their best advice for the things every couple must do to keep their relationship strong and healthy for the long haul. Whether you're in a newly committed relationship or have been married for years, I hope you listen to this episode! xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Premarital_Counseling_Interview_-_3520_1.11_PM.mp3
Category:relationships, how to, mental health -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 2 March 2020
Do you feel like it's hard to manage the stress of it all? If you're like so many of our high-achieving type-A life coaching and therapy clients here at Growing Self, you probably have days when you're feeling spread thin. How do you create a sustainable way of being that allows you to not just do the things that you need to do but manage your life in such a way that you don't constantly feel like a frantic stress-ball? My guest on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, Marilyn Paul, PhD, is here to show us how. Listen to get insights and tips, and compassionate, empowering ideas that you can use ASAP to cultivate calm and order in your life, so that you can feel genuinely stress free from the inside out. Your partner in growth,
Direct download: Stay_Stress_Free_GB_-_3220_4.05_PM.mp3
Category:How to, Self Improvement, Mental Health -- posted at: 4:37pm MDT |
Fri, 28 February 2020
Super quick announcement to let you know that, due to some unforeseen technical issues, the "How Healthy is Your Relationship" Quiz I've mentioned on a number of podcasts is now available by texting RELQUIZ to 33777. The old number (345345) is no longer operational as of 2/28/20. You can also access the quiz on the GrowingSelf.com website. I hope this change did not create any confusion or inconvenience for you. Okay, that's all -- I'll be back in touch with a new *actual* podcast for you on Monday! xoxo, LMB |
Mon, 24 February 2020
LEAVING a TOXIC RELATIONSHIP? Or thinking about it? If so, my heart goes out to you: You've already been through the wringer. As a therapist who specializes in toxic relationship addiction, and having researched and written a breakup recovery book, I know from years of experience that when you're addicted to a toxic relationship, it messes with your mind. Toxic relationships trash your self esteem. They damage your ability to trust. But even worse, after tolerating months or even years in a toxic relationship it can make you feel like you can't even trust your own judgement anymore. In order to provide you with the empowering support and perspective that can support YOUR growth and recovery, I've invited writer Shannon Ashley to join me on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. Shannon is not the type of "official" relationship expert that I often have on the show — she's so much more. She's a fellow traveler who has walked through the fire, and come out the other side. She has been able to give a voice to the experience that you're going through, and she has a unique perspective on what it really takes to heal from a toxic relationship. I'm so pleased that she's here to share her hard won wisdom with YOU today. Wishing you all the best,
Direct download: Leaving_Toxic_Relationship_-_2620_2.40_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships, Self Improvement, Mental Health -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 17 February 2020
There's a unique type of existential anxiety brewing in younger professionals lately who consider their career future and wonder, "Are robots coming for my job?" To help you move forward fearlessly into a bright professional future, I've invited future-focused career coach Nicolle Merrill to speak with us. She's here today to share her best future career advice with you, including:
All that and more, as we discuss YOUR career future on the latest episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Career_Future_Final.mp3
Category:Mental Health, Self Improvement, Career, Relationships -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 10 February 2020
If you want to create a fantastic relationship, there's one irreplaceable ingredient that you must have: Emotional safety. If you have emotional safety everything from communication to intimacy feels so much easier. But without it, everything feels like a battle. Today, on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I'm going to share the secrets behind how to create emotional safety in your relationship. We'll be discussing:
Happy Valentine's Day! Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby PS: If you want to take the free "How Healthy is Your Relationship" assessment I mention in this episode, text RELQUIZ to 345345 to get the link.
Direct download: Emotional_Safety_Final_-_2620_10.29_AM.mp3
Category:Self Improvement, Relationships, Mental Health -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 3 February 2020
If you started the new year with ambitious goals and aspirations that are already on life-support, or have been abandoned altogether: CONGRATULATIONS. Only now do you have the real-world information you need to reassess your situation, gain more clarity, and tweak your approach. To help you figure out how to achieve your most ambitious goals for real, I've invited master life coach Laurie Gerber of The Handel Group to share her tips for how to use setbacks to understand yourself more deeply, and shine a spotlight on the mental, emotional and practical strategies that will help you achieve your most ambitious goals. Listen and learn:
I hope that this conversation helps YOU dig deeper, get into alignment, and get clarity about where to refocus your energy. PS: We discussed a number of resources in this episode. One of them is our free Ten Year Plan exercise. If you haven't done this yet, here's the link to get the pdf or access to the online version.
Direct download: Audio_How_to_Achieve_Your_Most_Ambitious_Goals_-_2320_2.47_PM.mp3
Category:Self Improvement, Mental Health, Relationships, Career -- posted at: 3:37pm MDT |
Mon, 27 January 2020
The path to wellness can be a long and challenging one if you're dealing with a chronic health condition... particularly one that does not have an obvious cause or simple solution. Dealing with these kinds of health issues requires an enormous amount of strength, courage, and persistence — all of which can be hard to come by when you're at a low point, physically. If you or someone you love is going through this, help is here. My colleague at Growing Self, Amy-Noelle Shih, M.A., LPC is a holistic, empowering therapist and life coach who specializes in supporting people on their journey back to health, and is sharing her empowering advice with you on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. All for you... Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Path_To_Wellness_Final_-_1720_1.15_PM.mp3
Category:Self Improvement, Health, Mental Health -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 20 January 2020
How would you describe your relationship... with money? Secure? Anxious? Toxic? Neglected? Or... Easy? We all carry subconscious thoughts, feelings and values around money that impact our way of relating to it. Financial therapy helps you uncover these powerful inner forces, so that you can create a healthy money mindset so that you can feel empowered and in control of your finances. Financial therapy for couples helps you stop the "money fights" and get on the same page with your partner around money. Today's guest, financial therapist Jennifer Dunkle, is here to explain how YOU can develop a healthy money mindset — both individually, and as a couple — so that you can achieve your financial goals.
Direct download: Money_Mindset_Final_-_1820_6.35_AM.mp3
Category:Self Improvement, Relationships, Mental Health -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 13 January 2020
Human beings are built to bond — but we can also develop powerful bonds to unhelpful behaviors, toxic people, and even substances of abuse. Understanding the power of connection can help you break unhealthy attachments, and cultivate empowering, energizing new ones. Here's how... Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: The_Power_of_Connection_Final_-_1720_2.54_PM.mp3
Category:Self-Improvement, Mental Health, Relationships -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 6 January 2020
On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I have a special gift for both premarital couples AND couples on the brink of divorce: A special interview with Jim Sexton, author of "How to Stay in Love." Jim has a unique perspective — he has spent years working as a divorce lawyer and has sat with countless couples who are in the process of ending their marriage. Through these experiences he gained insight into the biggest mistakes couples can make,the most important things you can do to prevent a divorce, and key things that couples can do to keep their relationship healthy and strong. I hope this episode helps you understand your marriage in a new way, and provides some direction for how to repair your bond if things have been feeling hard lately. All the best,
Direct download: Relationship_Advice_From_a_Divorce_Lawyer_Audio_Final.mp3
Category:Relationships, Marriage, Communication -- posted at: 3:38pm MDT |
Tue, 31 December 2019
It's a brand new DECADE! To celebrate, we're doing something special in this episode: I'm going to walk you, step by step, through a "growth experience" that will help you create your very own Ten Year Plan so that you have clarity about where you want to be (and how to get there!) over the next ten years. To help you get the most out of this, I've created some free resources to assist you: Text 10YPlan to 33777 OR visit GrowingSelf.com/My-Ten-Year-Plan to get access to my (totally free) Online 10 Year Planning Tool and / or printable pdf. Then, together, we'll walk through this powerful activity together. By the end you'll have new self-awareness, clarity about what you want, but, most importantly, knowledge about specifically what you need to do (and not do!) to achieve your ideal reality 10 years from now. Let's do this! And HAPPY NEW YEAR! Your partner in growth,
Direct download: My_Ten_Year_Plan_GBand_-_123119_6.36_AM.mp3
Category:How to, Self Improvement, Mental Health, Career, Relationships -- posted at: 9:31am MDT |
Tue, 24 December 2019
It's so easy — especially for smart, determined, proactive and successful people — to spend a lot (a LOT) of time and energy pursuing goals that, at the end of the day, are not actually the most important or meaningful ones to them. Sounds crazy, but it's true: We're all vulnerable to absorbing messages from our families, social media, our culture, and certainly the combined efforts of many savvy marketers about what we should want. About who we should be. About what we should do with our lives. You Are The Author of Your Own Life StoryAt the end of the day, buying in to someone else's hopes and dreams for your life can lead you down the wrong path. Even if you — by virtue of your intelligence, determination, and hard work — are successful in creating all of it and achieving the ideals that you were handed, they will still feel hollow to you. Because they were never genuinely meaningful and important to YOU. And you will have spent so much of your precious time, energy, love, and devotion to achieving goals that — at the end of the day — could have been spent creating the life and reality that was your heart's desire. You deserve better. You deserve to own your own goals and create a destiny that will lead to your heart overflowing with authentic happiness and gratitude. You deserve, at the very end of your precious life, to have zero regrets.You deserve to feel pride and appreciation for what you have created, and what will last long after your time on this earth has passed. How to Design Your Life Around What Matters MostTo help you create this reality — the clear-eyed pursuit and attainment of the goals that are actually the most important and precious to YOU — I have a very special gift for you. On the latest episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I had the honor and pleasure of interviewing a very wise and insightful man, author Chris Meyer. Chris has a fascinating story: He spent many years as the director of a funeral home. (Stay with me here!) Over the years, he sat with many families as they planned their final goodbyes. He sat with people who were dying, and grieving families, and heard their stories — their gratitude, and their regrets, and the profound insights into what really mattered.... from the perspective of looking back on their lives. Today, he is here to share these insights directly with YOU. He is bringing you the messages from people at the end, so that YOU can design your life with intention, clarity and love, and maintain you focus on what really matters most to you. It's a heartfelt gift for you, on this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. I sincerely hope that it helps you get clarity and self-awareness for how you'd like to design YOUR life as we enter into a new decade, together. With love,
Direct download: Designing_Your_Life_Around_What_Matters_Most_udio_Podcast_-_122419_11.56_AM.mp3
Category:Self Improvement, Mental Health, Relationships, Career -- posted at: 12:29pm MDT |
Mon, 16 December 2019
Let's face it: We all have moments. Moments when we feel (justifiably!) angry or frustrated with other people, and moments when we lose our cool. While everyone is in agreement that there is a time and place for healthy anger, sometimes the lines can get blurred around when you're setting appropriate limits.... and when you're probably being unnecessarily aggressive about making your feelings known. How do we find that balance? The balance between not being a pushover and having a right to your feelings, but also having compassion for other people? Especially (here's the hard part) other people who may not be behaving well themselves. It's challenging for all of us. (#lifegoals!) The easy thing to do in the face of conflict is to lash out in anger, push people away, or freeze people out. It's much harder to stay in the ring and find a path of mutual understanding and repair. On the latest episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I had the great pleasure of speaking with NYC-based psychoanalyst Dr. Mark Borg about this subject, and his insights into how to lead a more compassionate life. Dr. Borg is the author of the book, "Don't Be a Dick: Change Yourself, Change Your World" and he shared thoughtful strategies for how to:
I hope this perspective and advice helps you and the people you love.
Direct download: How_to_Not_Be_a_Dick_Final.mp3
Category:Self Improvement, Relationships, Mental Health -- posted at: 4:12pm MDT |
Mon, 9 December 2019
Do you have relationship questions, dating questions, breakup questions, communication questions, therapy questions, or need to know how to handle a totally awkward family situation? Today on the podcast we're talking about all of it: The entire show is devoted to you. Your life, your relationships, and your questions. Specifically, we discussed:
Tune in! Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Lets_Talk_About_YOU-_Your_Questions_Answered_-_12919_4.40_PM.mp3
Category:Self Improvement, Relationships, Mental Health -- posted at: 4:52pm MDT |
Mon, 2 December 2019
Holidays: NOT The Happiest Time Of Year For HeartbreakDivorces and breakups are difficult any time of year, but most people find that the period between Thanksgiving and Valentine's day adds an extra layer of angst and anxiety to the recovery process. On this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm going to be giving you actionable advice to cope with a breakup or divorce during the holiday season. You'll learn how to take care of yourself, ways to manage your feelings, and most importantly -- how to use this time to heal, grow, and move on to a brighter future. Ps. Don't forget to download your free "action plan" for how to stop obsessing about your Ex: www.growingself.com/holiday-breakups
Direct download: Coping_With_a_Broken_Heart_Over_The_Holidays.m4a
Category:Self Improvement, Relationships, Mental Health -- posted at: 9:00am MDT |
Mon, 18 November 2019
Feeling judged is difficult at any time, but as we lead up to the holidays, I begin to hear from many therapy and life coaching clients that feeling judged or criticized during family gatherings creates a ton of anxiety. On today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm diving deeply into this topic, in order to help you find strategies to stop feeling judged (while you're staying true to yourself and your values). We'll discuss:
All this, and more, on this episode of the podcast. All the best,
Direct download: Releasing_Judgment_-_111819_3.15_PM.mp3
Category:Self Improvement, Mental Health, Relationships, -- posted at: 3:22pm MDT |
Mon, 11 November 2019
I often share relationship advice geared towards helping you proactively solve problems, practice good communication, and tackle tough issues before they become explosive... but that doesn't always happen. Sometimes, couples just have a terrible fight where they both say mean things to each other and feel like they damaged their relationship in the process. Has this just happened in your relationship? Have you just had a nasty fight, and now you're looking for help to get your relationship back on track? You're in the right place: Today I'm sharing my top tips for how to calm down, get back on track, and not just repair your relationship after a fight — but USE this experience to help your relationship grow and improve. PLUS, your questions about what to do when they're frequent fighting. All for you! Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: How_to_Repair_a_Relationship_After_a_Bad_Fight_-_111119_2.30_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships, Self Improvement, Mental Health -- posted at: 3:02pm MDT |
Mon, 4 November 2019
Do you have a running commentary in your head about all your mistakes, faults and shortcomings?
It's so painful. It's so exhausting. It's also so common — especially in high-achieving, successful types. (Ironically). Yes, the people who seem pretty darn close to perfect in the eyes of others are often the ones struggling the most to feel peaceful and self-accepting. Can you relate? Do you feel like you're never doing enough? Or like you have to be perfect (but even when you are, it could still be better? If so, the latest episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast is for you. We're going to be talking about how to stop beating yourself up, even if (and especially if) you're going through life circumstances that make you more vulnerable to beating yourself up. How to Stop Beating Yourself UpSpecifically, we're discussing:
Listen to this episode to learn how to start pushing back against this "inner bully" so that you can cultivate self-compassion, feel less insecure, feel good about yourself, and take pride in your many accomplishments so that you can own your awesome. You are worth it! All the best, PS: What's on YOUR mind these days? Have a question or a suggestion for an upcoming blog or podcast? I'm listening! Feel free to drop anything in the comments of this episode (here) or via this secure form.
Direct download: How_to_Stop_Beating_Yourself_Up_-_11419_2.24_PM.mp3
Category:How to, Self Improvement, Mental Health -- posted at: 2:46pm MDT |
Mon, 28 October 2019
Without understanding your subconscious self, it's very difficult to create real and lasting change in your life and in your relationships. You can try to make changes, but if your subconscious mind has other motivations.... it's going to win every time. Today, we're discussing:
All that, and more, on this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast.
Direct download: Understanding_Your_Subconscious_Mind.m4a
Category:Mental Health, Self Improvement, Career, Relationships -- posted at: 3:30pm MDT |
Mon, 21 October 2019
BECOMING EMOTIONALLY HEALTHY: Feelings. They happen to everyone, all the time. And yet, we don't always acknowledge them or talk about our feelings, much less take guidance from our emotions. Particularly in our culture, individuals and couples on a quest of "Happiness" can come to believe that being happy means being relatively free of dark emotions, like anger, sadness or fear. In fact, the opposite is true: Research shows that the happiest, most emotionally healthy people are actually the ones who are most comfortable with the full range of their emotions. Emotionally healthy people tend to be both self-accepting and self-aware: They know how they feel, and they have a great deal of tolerance and self-compassion when they're not feeling so great emotionally. They don't try to avoid bad feelings, and they also know how to (gently, appropriately) support themselves through challenging times. Emotional Health: Finding a BalanceEmotionally healthy people tend to be attuned to their emotions (and those of others). They know how to "lean in" to hard feelings with acceptance and without judgment. However, even though they're fully connected with their feelings they may not always react or take action from their emotions. A core component of authentic emotional health is knowing which feelings to listen to and which feelings to leave alone. It can be hard to develop emotional health and learn how to stay in balance between taking wisdom from your emotions, but not always "obeying them. Learning how to tell the difference between helpful and unhelpful feelings, helps you develop self-compassion, self-understanding, and self-control. Becoming Emotionally Healthy is a Personal Growth ProcessA key aspect of holistic personal growth is learning how to have an authentic, self-aware, and sensitive relationship with your own emotions. This kind of powerful personal growth work often addresses:
It's a lot! While this type of personal growth work often takes months (if not years) of focused attention in therapy or life coaching,it's so worth it. Becoming emotionally healthy is a foundational life skill for anyone on the path of self-actualization. The Benefits of Cultivating Emotional HealthLearning how to manage your emotions skillfully allows you to have better relationships with others, feel happier, improve your self-esteem, and also create a meaningful, values-based life for yourself. It's worth talking about, and that's where we're going together today on The Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. In addition to talking through all of the above, I'm answering some specific listener questions like:
All for YOU, on this episode of the podcast. See you there! PS: Resources I mentioned on today's show include the "Happy Heart" unit of my online Happiness Class, as well as a self-soothing breathing technique I shared on IGTV.
PPS: Once again, I recorded this episode LIVE on Instagram so that I could answer some real-time listener questions. If you'd like to join next time, follow me @drlisamariebobbyand you'll see me LIVE in your stories (almost) every Monday at 12pm MT. Hope to see you there! LMB
Direct download: How_to_Be_Emotionally_Healthy_-_102119_2.01_PM.mp3
Category:Self-Improvement, Mental Health, Relationships -- posted at: 3:09pm MDT |
Mon, 14 October 2019
Modern dating is complex and challenging. I've had so many listener questions about dating coming in lately, that I just had to address them on a podcast! In particular, we're diving deep and talking through some of the more complicated aspects of "dating life" that many people struggle with, like: What to do when you're terribly sad about being single? How do you know if you're ready to date after a bad breakup or divorce? If you're a single parent, when should you tell the kids about your new relationship? How do you trust a new person if you've been betrayed in the past? All that, and more, on this episode...
PS: Do YOU have questions? Ask away!
Direct download: Complex_Dating_Questions_-_101419_2.12_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships, Self Improvement, Mental Health -- posted at: 2:25pm MDT |
Tue, 8 October 2019
Do you ever feel overwhelmed by your life? Like you have so much to do and you're always busy, but also like you're not actually getting things done? Or, worse, are you SO busy that things are actually starting to fall through the cracks? Eek! This is incredibly stressful, and yet so many people are struggling with it: Especially conscientious, hardworking and responsible types. If this is a "pain point" for you, too, I hope you join me on this episode, to learn about:
All for YOU, on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: How_to_Get_Your_ST_together_-_10819_3.25_PM.mp3
Category:Careers, Self-Improvement, Mental Health -- posted at: 3:51pm MDT |
Mon, 23 September 2019
EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE: How well do you understand other people? How well do you understand yourself? Do you know how to handle emotionally sensitive moments? Because emotional intelligence skills really are so important, I decided to devote an entire episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast to helping you understand emotional intelligence and how to improve emotional intelligence. Listen, and learn:
All the best, Ps: Get access to the resources we discussed in this episode on the post for this episode here.
Direct download: Cultivating_Emotional_Intelligence_-_92319_4.02_PM.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:48pm MDT |
Tue, 3 September 2019
Do you ruminate? Think about things that happened in the past? Worry about what could happen in the future? Feel irritated with other people? Or struggle with the anxiety of comparing yourself with others?
There is an alternative to being at the mercy of your mercurial mind. Learning how to mindfully and with intention get in control of your inner experience can help you break free from anxiety and worry, rise above stress, attain profound levels of empathy and connection with others, and feel happier and more joyful in the process. But how? How do we rise above the churning of our minds and our egos, to enter into a state of compassion and connection? Well, my guest on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast is Preethaji, a philosopher, mystic, the author of The Four Sacred Secrets and the co-founder of the international school of self-development, the O & O Academy based in India. Listen to this episode as Preethaji and I discuss:
We're digging deep, discussing how to mindfully heal old wounds, release self-limiting old beliefs, and taking responsibility for the way you show up in the world. I posed a couple of YOUR questions to her too, and her perspective was refreshing. I really enjoyed speaking with Preethaji, and I hope you get as much out of listening to this episode as I did in making it for you. Your fellow traveler,
Direct download: Living_in_a_Beautiful_State_-_9319_2.59_PM.mp3
Category:Self-Improvement, Mental Health, Relationships -- posted at: 4:37pm MDT |
Mon, 26 August 2019
YOUR RELATIONSHIP QUESTIONS, ANSWERED | Lately, I've had quite a few listeners and readers get in touch with their relationship questions. I thought I'd devote an entire episode of the podcast to answering them! Specifically, I'm offering free relationship advice around these common questions on today's episode:
Your burning relationship questions answered, on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast! All the best, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby PS: One of the resources I mentioned to a listener's question was our "How Healthy is Your Relationship" quiz. Click the link if you'd like to take it too. PSS: Do YOU have a question? You're welcome to ask it here on the comments section for this post: https://www.growingself.com/free-relationship-advice-from-a-marriage-counselor, or via my Instagram page: https://www.instagram.com/drlisamariebobby I just might answer it on an upcoming episode! :)
Direct download: Free_Relationship_Advice_-_82619_4.51_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships -- posted at: 5:07pm MDT |
Mon, 19 August 2019
THE POWER OF DECLUTTERING: Do you ever feel oppressed by all the stuff you're hanging on to? Is it hard to get organized, and stay organized? Do you feel like your life is crammed full of obligations, relationships, things — even a career — that no longer fits the person you've grown into? Intentionally getting clear about who you are NOW, and where you want to go with your life can help you cut through all the clutter and develop an environment and a lifestyle that feels satisfying and congruent with the best parts ofyou. True, meaningful decluttering goes much deeper than just cleaning out a closet. Decluttering and maintaining a values-based, intentional lifestyle is an exercise in personal clarity and evolution. To help YOU along your journey of renewal and growth I've invited decluttering expert Olivia Heine to join me on the latest episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. If you're looking for some decluttering inspiration, you'll definitely want to listen to this episode. We're discussing:
So much good stuff to share with you. Olivia and I hope this discussion helps YOU get clear about who you are, what you want.... and what it's time to release! All the best, Ps: Questions? Comments? Join the conversation! www.growingself.com/the-power-of-decluttering
Direct download: The_Power_of_Decluttering_-_81919_1.02_PM.mp3
Category:How to, Self Improvement, Mental Health -- posted at: 1:52pm MDT |
Mon, 12 August 2019
On today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I'm talking all about how to not JUST find your purpose and highest calling, but how to start living your life with self-awareness and intention so that you can design the reality you want. Specifically, we're discussing:
If you have been feeling stuck lately and are struggling to find clarity and direction in life, I hope you listen to this episode. With love and respect, Ps: One of the strategies I offered on this episode involves thinking about times that you experience "flow" and writing about it. You are invited to share your "flow moments" in the comments on the blog at www.GrowingSelf.com!
Direct download: Finding_Your_Lifes_Purpose_-_81219_4.30_PM.mp3
Category:Mental Health, Self Improvement, Career, Relationships -- posted at: 4:59pm MDT |
Mon, 5 August 2019
The Transformational SeasonDid you know that right now is possibly the best time you'll have all year to make real and lasting change in your life? That's not hyperbole. In my experience as a therapist, life coach, marriage counselor, and fellow traveler on this journey of life, I have noticed that this season -- the annual transition from summer to fall -- is often when people are feeling most intrinsically motivated, and most able to make real and lasting change in their lives. Perhaps it's a natural itch to get back to work after the languid summer season, particularly if you've done a good job of relaxing well. Perhaps it's a lifetime of major life transitions in the form of back to school experiences. For whatever reason, now is the time when you're ready to cultivate fresh new energy in your life and plant the seeds of a new chapter. Whether it's your career, your clutter, your personal habits, or your how you spend your time that is begging for re-evaluation, the time is ripe to sweep out the old and usher in the new. On this episode of The Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I'm going to be teaching you four crucial steps to practice as you harness the natural, transformational power of this season and use it to affect real and lasting change in your life. You'll learn how to access your self awareness, create intentional change, get deeper access to your core values, and make changes that last. Here's to your liberation!
Direct download: Why_its_Time_to_Change_Your_Life_-_82216_12.03_PM.mp3
Category:Self-Help, Motivation, Life Coaching -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 22 July 2019
Many people get involved with therapy or life coachinghere at Growing Self in order to improve all their relationships — not just their romantic partnerships or marriages. Let's face it: Friendships can present their own unique challenges. If this is an area of growth for you, too, you'll definitely want to listen to this episode. I'll be discussing:
I hope these ideas help you strengthen your friendships and keep healthy people in your life! xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby, LMFT, LP, BCC Ps: Thoughts? Questions? Comments? Here's the link to join the discussion at GrowingSelf.com
Direct download: Why_Friendships_End_-_72219_3.01_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Relationships -- posted at: 4:48pm MDT |
Mon, 8 July 2019
The Art of Vacationing WellIt is vacation season, and you probably have some getaways planned. (I hope.) But if you are of the "rest is for mortals" mindset, you are not alone. So today I'm bringing you ten tips that will help you make the most of your hard earned vacation time -- whether you travel to exotic lands or just stick around town. We'll be discussing how to: 1) Take time off without feeling guilty about it And much, much more -- all on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast.
Direct download: The_Art_of_Vacationing_Well_.mp3
Category:Self Help, Mindfulness, Relaxation -- posted at: 3:00am MDT |
Mon, 1 July 2019
Saving a Relationship, Single-HandedlyIt can feel really discouraging when you are eager to work on your relationship, and your partner is less than enthused about going to marriage counseling or relationship coaching. But know this: Every couple who gets to marriage counseling does so because one of the partners initiates it. In your relationship, that person might need to be you. And that is okay.
This episode will give you insight into what might be going on inside your partner when they say things like:
I'm sharing some tips and ideas that can help you you ease their concerns. I hope this advice helps you help YOUR partner take the first step forward with you, and start growing back together again. All the best, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: When_Your_Wife_or_Husband_Refuses_To_Go_To_Marriage_Counseling.mp3
Category:Relationships -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 24 June 2019
Welcoming a new baby into the world can be one of the most exciting and joyful times for a couple... and also one of the hardest. It's unfortunately very common to have marriage problems after baby. As marriage counselors and family therapists we often see that most couples spend so much time and energy preparing for the birth, and how to take care of their newborn, they neglect to think about how they'll keep their relationship strong after baby. Because this transition to parenthood can feel so challenging for many couples, we're devoting a whole episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast to supporting you through it. Marriage and family therapist and parenting coach Jessica Small will be sharing her tips for how to not just keep your relationship strong after baby, but set yourself up for success in the years to come. Listen now to get Jessica's advice for how to:
We hope that this information helps you successfully transition from being a happy couple to a happy family! Sincerely,
Direct download: Strong_Relationship_After_Baby_-_62419_7.12_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Relationships, Parenting -- posted at: 7:30pm MDT |
Mon, 3 June 2019
Do you feel frustrated with your current job? Perhaps you generally feel good about your line of work, but want to take it to the next level. Maybe, like so many people, you're feeling a vague sense of dissatisfaction with your job: You know you want more, you know you can do more, but aren't sure which direction you should go in — much less how to make it happen. Today, you're in for a treat. I've invited Denver career coachand leadership coach Nicholas Manning to speak with me on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, and share his best advice for how to move past paralysis and stagnation, and start taking control of your career in a new way. We're talking about many things to support your professional development, including:
We help this career advice helps you make positive changes, and develop a more fulfilling and rewarding career! Lisa Marie Bobby, PhD & Nicholas Manning, MBA
Direct download: How_to_Get_Ahead_at_Work_Career_Advice_-_6519_2.12_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Career Development, Personal Growth -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Tue, 28 May 2019
On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm putting on my dating coach hat to give you some free dating advice for how to date with confidence, and hopefully find your true love this summer. I'll be discussing:
If you're single and hoping to find true love this summer, you'll definitely want to listen. Xoxo,
Direct download: Finding_True_Love_Dating_Advice_-_52819_1.28_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help -- posted at: 1:59pm MDT |
Mon, 20 May 2019
These days, travel is more than just taking a trip. Where you go, who you go with, and what you do when you're in complete control of your time says a lot about you. Your personality, your interests, and even your identity becomes intertwined with what you do during your leisure time. More importantly, traveling with intention can lead to personal growth. Having new experiences, getting a fresh perspective, and putting yourself in challenging situations can help you expand: Becoming wiser, more worldly, and more resilient. Traveling well can also provide you with benefits that linger long after you get back home. Because traveling well is such an important aspect of personal growth, I've invited travel writer Aditi Shrikant of Vox to discuss the psychological impact of travel on people, and things to consider as you're planning your summer adventure. She shares her insight into making travel meaningful, and as well as some tips to get the most personal impact from your vacation. Your partner in adventure!
Direct download: How_Travel_Helps_You_Grow_-_52119_1.04_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Personal Growth -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 13 May 2019
We think of the process of changing your life as a positive thing — one that is hopeful, and infused with joy. However, here's the dirt: While the results are absolutely positive, no-one ever, ever, changes because they're just so happy with their life as it currently is. No. People actually change because they are frustrated, annoyed, hurt, embarrassed, experiencing negative consequences, or just completely worn out and exhausted from living the way they have been. It takes a brave soul to raise their hand and say, "This is what changing my life actually was like — tell my story." It's such a treasure when that happens though. We all learn from each other, and hearing how people just like us learned, changed, grew, and evolved, creates an inspirational path that we can then follow ourselves. Today, on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast that is exactly what we are doing. My dear colleague, fellow Denver therapist and online life coach Polly Drew has an inspiring story of personal transformation to share. She talks about the change process: From her first awareness that she had a problem, to how she got the motivation to start making changes, to the support and systems she needed to put into place in order to be successful in changing her life. We're talking all about what it takes to really change your life on this episode of the podcast. With love,
Direct download: POLLY_-Final-_MAKING_POSITIVE_CHANGES_-_42919_3.05_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help -- posted at: 4:05pm MDT |
Mon, 6 May 2019
In my role as a therapist, life coach and breakup recovery coach here at Growing Self, I have had the honor and privilege to walk along side many people as they make agonizing decisions about whether or not to stay in a relationship. They often have deep ambivalence about the relationship: They love their person, and they acknowledge that the relationship has many good aspects, and yet they simply feel in their heart that it is not the right relationship for them. So they stay. Sometimes, for years. If this is familiar to you (or someone you know) this podcast is for you. In this episode I'm addressing:
I hope this perspective helps!
Direct download: How_to_Break_Up_With_Someone_You_Love_-_5619_3.41_PM.mp3
Category:relationships, self help -- posted at: 4:28pm MDT |
Mon, 29 April 2019
Growing Self is devoted to helping you feel happier, and get better results in your relationships and your career. Over the years of being a therapist and coach I've learned that there are a couple of specific skills that, when learned, can change everything for you; you'll feel happier, less stressed, more confident, and empowered. I teach these skills to my private therapy and coaching clients, I teach them in my online Happiness Class, and I'm here today to teach them to you, too. These strategies work for me, they work for my clients, and they'll work for you too. Listen now, and let's get started! xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: How_to_Feel_Happier_and_Less_Stressed_-_42919_1.01_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Personal Growth -- posted at: 2:03pm MDT |
Mon, 22 April 2019
Money. Love it, hate it, it matters. Financial concerns can impact every area of your life, including your relationships, your career and even your self-esteem. Learning how to take charge of your financial success is vital to creating the life you want.
Learning how to be better with money is not just a matter of making a budget and stopping your $5 latte habit. Genuine financial success requires self-awareness, clarity about your core values, and intention -- as well as a plan. Financial management is a vital life-skill that is learned, and once you have a tool-box of strategies to manage your money you can flourish in every way. That's why, on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm speaking with Profit Boss Hilary Hendershott.Hilary is a Certified Financial Planner, financial advisor and a wealth coach. She has helped many people learn how to not just manage their finances, but create genuine abundance in their lives. She's here with actionable advice to help you:
Listen to our discussion and get actionable advice from Hilary about how to start changing your relationship with money for the better, starting today.
Ps: Have a follow up question about financial success or any other Love, Happiness or Success topic? Cruise over to www.growingself.com and share it in the comments!
Direct download: Financial_Success_-_42219_1.50_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Relationships, Finances -- posted at: 3:37pm MDT |
Mon, 15 April 2019
Adult ADHD: A Blessing and a CurseWondering if you have Adult ADHD, or suspicious you do? Want to take an "Adult ADHD Test?" Here's the first test: Does the fact that this is a podcast about ADHD rather than a written article make you feel relieved? (Because you can run / clean / drive / keep futzing around with whatever you want to instead of having to sit still for a REALLY LONG TIME (like 8 minutes) and laboriously read through an article and take a quiz?) Ding ding! On today's episode of The Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, we're talking about how to tell the difference between garden-variety disorganization and real-deal ADHD. I'll give you an "Adult ADHD Quiz" to help you determine if you might have it, or if someone you love may struggle with it. I'll also be sharing some strategies you can use to conquer Adult ADHD, and rise to your magnificent potential. Check out the video and book resources I mentioned on the podcast at www.growingself.com/adult-adhd-test. Learn more about Dr. Bobby, her coaching practice, and her online "Happiness Class" at www.growingself.com (Music Credits: "Networking" by The Knife) |
Mon, 8 April 2019
Generational differences in the workplace aren't something that you might always have on the top of your mind, but they can impact you more than you may realize. How you communicate, how you work with a team, your expectations about your career path, and even the way you relate to authority figures can all be connected to the point in time that your personality and professional identity were being developed. Understanding your generational differences, particularly how they show up on-the-job, can help you not just understand yourself more deeply, but help you work more effectively with your colleagues. Join career and leadership coaches Teena E and Markie K on this episode to gain understanding of why you are the way you are on the job, and how you can use awareness of yourself and others to create collaborative connections with your colleagues. All the best, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Generational_Differences_in_the_Workplace_-_4819_3.55_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Career Development, Personal Growth -- posted at: 5:01pm MDT |
Mon, 25 March 2019
It's so, so hard to let go...
In the aftermath of a breakup or even divorce, many people continue on with their Ex in quasi-relationship "situationships." Living with their Ex, having sex with an Ex, being hang-out buddies with an Ex, or texting back and forth with an Ex are all common. While this is understandable, it's also destructive. As a therapist, marriage counselor, and breakup recovery expert, I have had a ring-side seat to many, many relationships, divorces and breakup recovery situations. I've spoken to the broken hearted, as well as to their Exes and have learned a lot about why. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm sharing my perspective on:
All the best, Ps: We discussed a number of resources in this episode. Here are the links to learn more:
Direct download: Sex_With_Your_Ex_-_32519_3.25_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Breakups, Divorce -- posted at: 4:20pm MDT |
Mon, 18 March 2019
How do you know if you're with the right person? If your relationship is good but not perfect, is that okay? How do you know if you're settling? When do you invest in a relationship, and when should you bail? So. Many. Questions. This angst was captured perfectly by a recent question that someone asked on our Growing Self Facebook page: "How do you know if you should marry the guy? I’m in my mid twenties and loads of my friends are facing this question, as am I. You’ve been with them a couple years, it’s good but not perfect ... Do you break up and look for more or is he the one?" On this episode, we're discussing how to figure out if you're compatible, how good is good enough, what things in a relationship can change (and what can't) and the surprising shift in thinking that will help you see the potential of your relationship a different way — for better or for worse. xo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Are_You_Compatible_-_31819_3.55_PM.mp3
Category:relationships, self help -- posted at: 4:07pm MDT |
Mon, 25 February 2019
Have you been daydreaming about quitting your day job and becoming self-employed? Lots of people share the fantasy of starting a business or doing their own thing, but many hit a wall when they think about how to actualize their goal of supporting themselves without a job.
If you want to get the real-deal on what it takes to become successfully self-employed, you're in for a treat. I asked an experienced freelancer, NY-based journalist Michael Stahl, how he cut the cord and started doing what he loved for a living — and found success in following his passion. He shares his advice for how to make the transition from employee to "free" (as well as how to deal with the ensuing anxiety) on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. Listen to his inspiring story and get insight on how to generate a plan, manage the anxiety, and cultivate the grit that will sustain you as you make your own way. Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Doing_Your_Own_Thing_-_22519_1.26_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Entrepreneur -- posted at: 1:46pm MDT |
Wed, 13 February 2019
Love is not enough, actually. You can have an over-all great relationship with someone you love very much, and still feel like you're not really getting what you need in order to feel truly connected and cared for. Help is here. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm speaking to a true expert on this subject: Dr. Robert Navarra. Dr. Navarra has decades of experience as a marriage counselor, couples therapist, and addictions counselor. He trains other therapists on The Gottman Method of couples therapy— the gold standard in evidence-based couples counseling. He has also pioneered a new, evidence based method for helping couples reconnect in the aftermath of addiction. He's here to share his insight and relationship advice with you, so that you can finally get your needs met in your relationship. Listen now, to start making positive changes today. (You might even consider listening to this episode with your partner, just in case they have some things to share too.) Happy Valentine's Day! Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: How_to_Get_Your_Needs_Met_in_a_Relationship_-_21319_2.31_PM.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:28pm MDT |
Mon, 4 February 2019
Has your relationship been feeling hard lately? Arguing, bickering, sullen silences, critical comments, and rampant invalidation? If so, you're not alone. Virtually every couple has gone through rough patches like these. Relationship problems are exhausting, but mentally and emotionally draining too. Your relationship should be a source of comfort and support, not one of stress and anxiety. If you're normal, at a certain point, it starts to feel unsustainable to keep going as you have been, and start searching for solutions. You may even start entertaining the "final solution" of breaking up or getting divorced. There is a path forward that can bring you two back together again. It's actually fairly simple (but not easy). Listen to this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast for advice from a marriage counselor for how YOU can get your relationship back on track. Happy Valentine's Day!
Direct download: How_to_Save_Your_Relationship_Without_Breaking_Up.mp3
Category:Relationships -- posted at: 3:48pm MDT |
Mon, 21 January 2019
Although many people say, "marriage is just a piece of paper that doesn't really change a relationship," as a premarital counselor (and long married person) I often smile to myself when I hear this. What I've found to be true is that becoming engaged to marry most definitely does change a relationship, often in positive ways. Engagement also affords thoughtful couples opportunities to build their relationship's strengths, as well as take proactive action to prevent possible relationship problems in the future. On this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm speaking with expert premarital counselor Rachel Harder about the changes that happen in a relationship once couples get engaged, plus the skills and strategies that she teaches her premarital couples to help set them up for success. If you're recently engaged, want to be, or know someone who is, listen to our interview to hear about the most important domains of your relationship to focus on in order to build the foundation for a happy, successful and satisfying marriage. And, CONGRATULATIONS! Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby, LMFT and Rachel Harder, M.A., LMFT-C
Direct download: Ways_your_relationship_changes_after_you_get_engaged_-_12119_4.00_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships -- posted at: 4:05pm MDT |
Mon, 14 January 2019
Building Better Relationships: Have you ever left relationship books laying around, or put a relationship podcast on hoping that a certain someone may reflect on their own behavior and be a better partner or friend for you? Have you ever dropped a hint (or SEVEN) to a coworker, boss, or friend about how you feel in your relationship with them, and how you hope they might change? So often, we feel helpless around how to improve our relationships, because we feel like the quality of our relationships depends on what other people are doing or not doing. It may sound counter-intuitive, but by focusing on your own "soft skills" you can transform your relationships single-handedly. Today, on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm taking to my colleague (and relationship expert) Kathleen Carroll-Stutts about how to do that. Kathleen is a life coach, individual therapistand couples counselor here on the team at Growing Self. She is the facilitator of our Relationship Skills Group, and is here today to share her system for how to develop yourself so that you can build better relationships with the most important people in your life. Listen to our interview to learn how to develop the communication skills and relationship skills that can help you build better relationships. Specifically: Foundational Relationship Skills
Intermediate Relationship Skills
Advanced Communication Skills and Relationship Skills
We sincerely hope that this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast helps to give you some direction for building better relationships in your life! xo,
Direct download: Building_Better_Relationships_-_11419_2.33_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help -- posted at: 4:12pm MDT |
Mon, 7 January 2019
Advice From a Life Coach: Here we are, just a week into the new year. If you're like many people, your track record on those resolutions may already be spotty. Or perhaps you've tossed the whole plan out the window already. Fear not: Making changes is not about doing the thing perfectly every time. You don't just hop in a car, point the steering wheel in the general direction of the grocery store, and then expect to get there do you? Of course not. From the moment you pull out of the driveway you're turning, speeding up, slowing down, taking detours, stopping for gas — you adjust and flex the whole way there. BUT. That's not to say that it isn't helpful to have tools and strategies to help you along the way. Just like you use your handy Google Map App to get you from A-Z, there are many useful tricks and life-hacks to make doing what you want to do easier than it would be if you just wandered out without a map. Particularly if your goals for the new year involve creating a new keystone habit, and making it stick, there's an easy way and a hard way. Here at Growing Self, we're all about making growth and success as simple and painless as possible. So, here's a bonus episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast to support you on your journey. I'll be discussing:
You can do this! Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: How_to_Make_Changes_Stick_-_1719_4.26_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Productivity, Fitness, Habits -- posted at: 4:30pm MDT |
Tue, 1 January 2019
I want you to be successful at creating the change you desire in this new year. So for that reason, today's episode is all about how to find and lovingly cultivate one solid keystone habit. This surprisingly simple technique launches a chain of successes that will carry you forward. Join me and learn how to make great things happen — the easy way! With love, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: The_Power_of_a_Keystone_Habit.mp3
Category:How to, Self Improvement, Mental Health -- posted at: 10:48am MDT |
Mon, 3 December 2018
When you get married or commit yourself to a long-term relationship, you're signing on to support each other through thick and thin. If you're fortunate, most of the time things are okay: the sun shines and you live in the benevolence of the universe. But not always. Unexpected job loss, a death in the family, serious illness or infertility— these are only some of the common issues that many (most? all?) couples are going to face together at some point or another. These can be particularly challenging to cope with during the holiday season. So, today on the show, we're going there and talking about how to negotiate these hard times successfully, as a couple. Master marriage counselor, couples therapist, and relationship coach Meagan Terry, M.A., LMFT will be sharing her best relationship advice to help you both have greater empathy and compassion for each other when the chips are down. She'll be discussing communication strategies you can use to stay connected through hard times, and also some tips for how to support each other as individuals around things like illness, grief, and death, and infertility. A master career coach is also sharing her best tips for how to cope with the stress of a layoff or job loss and stay connected with your partner as you go through it. We hope that this discussion helps you find your way through this hard time together. Yours sincerely,
Direct download: Getting_Through_Hard_Times_Together_-_12418_1.08_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Relationships -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 19 November 2018
Your Holidays Will Be Good When Your Boundaries Are.In case you hadn't noticed the towering pumpkin displays in the grocery store, the catalogues and coupons clogging your mailbox, or the tinsel-spangled interiors of every store you dare step foot in... the holidays are upon us. The holidays can be so amazing: Its the time to expand our souls, embrace generosity and good will, enjoy the warmth of our families and friends, and be grateful for the wonderful relationships in our lives. And... as you well know, holidays can also be fraught with stress, overwhelm, overspending, and tense moments with family members. In my experience as both a marriage counselor and therapist (as well as personally) the "dark side" of the holiday experience often happens when people struggle to hold healthy boundaries. The Usual Suspects:
Because these kinds of boundary problems are so common (and so darn avoidable, with advance planning) I thought I'd put together some holiday-specific boundary advice on this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. I'm sharing some tools to help you get your boundaries "just right," and enjoy yourself this year. I sincerely hope that it helps you avoid the pitfalls and enhance all the wonderful moments that the month ahead has to offer. From me to you, Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Boundaries-_The_Holiday_Edition_.m4a
Category:relationships, self help -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 5 November 2018
For those of you so deeply affected by the latest crazy-making experience in your toxic workplace that you're almost too stunned to type... For those of you sitting at your desk, cradling your head in your hands... For those of you frantically searching co-workers’ faces for clues, wondering if you’re the only one noticing the madness... This podcast is for you. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm joined by expert career and executive coach. She's sharing her best career advice for how to tell if your workplace is toxic, and if so, how to survive... and ultimately move on victoriously. Links to the resources we discussed here: https://www.growingself.com/toxic-workplace-career-advice All the best, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Toxic_Workplace_Survival_Strategies_-_11518_12.16_PM.mp3
Category:Career Advice, Toxic Workplace, Job Stress -- posted at: 12:53pm MDT |
Mon, 22 October 2018
In our hectic, demanding lives, it's easy to lose sight of ourselves: Who we are, how we feel and what we need. Even more challenging can be figuring out how to assert all-of-the-above in our relationships with others. This is particularly true if you've been existing in a toxic relationshipor codependent relationship, or navigating the aftermath of a bad breakup. In the midst of stressful circumstances, attaining empowerment can seem out of reach — especially when you've been focused outwards rather than within.
Attaining EmpowermentOn today's show my colleague, therapist and life coach Teena Evert and I are talking about many of the "pieces" involved with cultivating personal empowerment, including:
I hope our conversation gives you insight into how to begin cultivating empowerment in your life. With love and respect, PS: We discussed a number of resources on the show today. Find links to them here: https://www.growingself.com/self-empowerment
Direct download: Attaining_Empowerment_-_102218_2.58_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Mindfulness, Confidence, Relationships -- posted at: 3:10pm MDT |
Tue, 9 October 2018
Are you on pins and needles, riddled with anxiety about a new relationship? You're not alone. For most of our dating coaching clients, the "dating" part is not that hard. You put a profile together, attend social functions with a smile on your face, and you're going to have opportunities. Going on an actual date or three is not the biggest deal. What IS the biggest deal, and what our dating coaching clients really struggle with, is how to manage all the anxiety, insecurity, and angst about the unknown that comes with finding someone they really like and who they've started seeing regularly. That's when all the questions come up. Today, on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I'm tackling some of your new relationship questions in hopes of putting some of that new relationship anxiety to rest. We'll discuss:
All that, and more, on the podcast. PS: Resources we discussed on the show: The How Healthy is Your Relationship Quiz, and How to Cultivate Healthy Self-Love PPS: Do YOU have questions for me? Dating questions, or otherwise? Leave them in the comments: I read every one! :)
Direct download: New_Relationship_Anxiety_-_10818_4.28_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Dating, Relationships, Anxiety -- posted at: 3:07pm MDT |
Mon, 10 September 2018
"How long does it take to get over a breakup?" "How do you get over a breakup when you live together" "How to stop thinking about your Ex?" "How to get over a bad breakup?" As you know if you've ever listened to my podcast, I have a special place in my heart for people who are in the midst of a bad breakup, and I really want to help. (You can read my own horrible breakup story here.) I thought that, instead of trying to answer so many specific breakup questions, it might be more helpful to everyone to learn more about the stages of a breakup. My hope is that in learning about the stages of a breakup, you can identify where you are in this process and get some direction for how to move past your breakup. I also hope that learning about the stages of a breakup will provide you with guidance about how to move forward after a breakup, no matter what stage of breakup you're currently in. I'll be sharing tips on how to move through each stage of a breakup on today's show. I hope that this breakup advice, and the breakup success stories I share help you find your way forward too. Yours in healing,
Direct download: Stages_of_a_Breakup_-_How_to_Heal_a_Broken_Heart_-_91018_3.19_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Breakups, Divorce -- posted at: 3:45pm MDT |
Mon, 27 August 2018
Break up or stay together? Who hasn't wondered the same, during a seriously difficult time in their relationship? Or, entertained an even bigger question: Should you try to save a relationship? How hard should you work? Especially a relationship that has been feeling really hard and unsatisfying for a long time? How do you know when it's time to call it quits?
Because deciding whether to break up or stay together is such a hard decision, we have many questions come through from clients, listeners of our podcast, and readers of our blog wanting help in deciding if their relationship can be saved, or if it's time to throw in the towel. They want to know things like:
If you've been going through a hard time in your relationship that has led you to have doubts, I hope that this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast can help shed some light on signs that it's time to break up, or whether your relationship can be saved. Sincerely, P.S. We discussed a number of resources on this show. Here's where to find the links to all of them: https://bit.ly/2Pga85B
Direct download: Break_UP_or_Stay_Together_-_82818_1.37_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 13 August 2018
How to Create The Career and Life You Want The fall season is nearly upon us, and with it comes fresh, transformational energy. If you're like many people showing up at Growing Self for life coaching, career coaching or therapy right now, it's because this is the time of year to let go of the old, get re-aquainted with yourself, and design new goals for the next chapter of your life. To support you in your quest for personal evolution, life coach and career coach will be sharing her advice for how to move forward fearlessly in your career, your life and your relationships. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast we're talking about:
Direct download: Designing_Your_Life_-_81318_12.35_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Career Development, Personal Growth -- posted at: 4:30pm MDT |
Mon, 30 July 2018
Miscarriage or infertility can be very hard to talk about, and the lack of support for women and couples going through it can make it even harder to know where to go for help. For this reason, I've invited Growing Self marriage counselor, therapist, women's health and fertility expert Sonya J to join me on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. We're talking about:
If you've been dealing with this extremely difficult life experience, we hope that you join us and listen to this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. Sincerely,
Direct download: Pregnancy_Loss_and_Infertility-_How_to_Cope_-_73018_3.57_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Pregnancy, Infertility -- posted at: 4:27pm MDT |
Mon, 16 July 2018
Any good marriage counselor or couples therapist will tell you that sex isn't the ONLY thing in a great relationship. Friendship, teamwork, communication, emotional safety, respect, and appreciation are all fundamentally important too. And yet, even when all those strengths are present, if you're not connecting sexually over a long period of time... eventually lack of physical intimacy can erode even the best relationship. To help us understand the most common sexual problems that couples encounter, and how to resolve them, I've invited expert sex therapist Dori Bagi to speak with us on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. We'll be discussing:
Hope this conversation helps you find your way back together again...
Direct download: Restore_Sexual_Intimacy_in_Your_Relationship.mp3
Category:Self Help, Relationships -- posted at: 2:45pm MDT |
Mon, 18 June 2018
Anger Management Help"Anger issues" are a common problem for many people, and in many relationships. So today on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I've enlisted the support of my colleague Dr. Georgiana, to share her expertise about anger. Dr. Georgiana is, among other things, an Emotional Intelligence Coach, Marriage and Family Therapist, and a Life Coach too. She specializes in helping angry people learn how to get to a better place, helps couples communicate and reduce the anger and frustration in their relationships, and I'm so pleased to have her share her "anger advice" with you today too. We'll be talking about:
I hope that listening to this podcast helps you learn how to manage anger, and find inner peace — both for yourself, and in your relationship. All the best,
Direct download: Anger_Management_-_Managing_Anger_in_Relationships_-_61118_2.25_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help -- posted at: 12:35pm MDT |
Mon, 4 June 2018
Everyone has the right to growth, and to feel safe, comfortable, welcome, and understood in what should be the most healing environment of all: Therapy, life coaching or marriage counseling. However, for African Americans, people of color, and other minority groups in the U.S., that has not always been the case. Particularly for black people, getting involved in meaningful growth work can be fraught with obstacles. The time to change that is now. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I've invited my colleagues Anastacia Sams, Teresa Thomas, and Zachary Gaiter to talk about their perspective as black therapists and black marriage counselors. We're discussing:
We hope you join us today on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast.
Direct download: Personal_Growth_For_Everyone_-_Black_Counselors_Speak_Out_-_6418_4.12_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Relationships -- posted at: 4:30pm MDT |
Mon, 21 May 2018
Have you been considering a career change? Sometimes, the first, hardest step is getting clear about what it is that you want to do. But even with that clarity, there can be other obstacles that need to be worked through before you can find a career that you love. Questions like:
How — Or If — To Change Careers Today on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I have the great pleasure of speaking with a master career coach, an executive coach, and a life coach. She's sharing her wisdom and experience to help you figure out if it's time to make a career change, and if so, find your ideal career and transition into a job you love. Today, we're talking about:
No matter if you're a recent graduate looking to get clarity about what you want to do with your life, if you're in an established career that you're feeling dissatisfied and discouraged with, or if you're getting back into the workforce after taking a break, you'll definitely want to hear this great career advice. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Finding_a_Career_You_Love_-_Career_Change_Advice__-_52118_11.24_AM.mp3
Category:Career Advice, Job Change, Career Change -- posted at: 11:40am MDT |
Tue, 8 May 2018
Do you know what's standing between you and the life you want? Really? As a life coach and therapist I regularly meet with clients who show up for counseling or coaching, certain that they know what their problem is, and what needs to be done to fix it. Aaannnddd.... the next phase of the work in counseling or coaching is often helping people go further, and dig deeper to understand what the true source of "the problem" really is. (Hint: It is almost never what you think it is). Once that is revealed, we can then move to creating action-oriented strategies that will create meaningful and lasting change. They go from feeling stuck, and like they're just spinning their wheels as they ineffectively chasing after what they think is the solution to the problem, to feeling like they are actually making progress. But the first step is truly self-awareness. If you don't know what's really getting in your way, you can't possibly fix it. Can you relate? If so, you're in luck: Today on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm walking you through an activity that will raise your self-awareness, and help you "get under the hood" of your inner experience. You'll learn some new things about yourself AND get direction for how to start making changes. Here's to growth!
Direct download: Uncover_Your_Hidden_Obstacles_-_5818_9.14_AM.mp3
Category:Self Help -- posted at: 4:51pm MDT |
Mon, 23 April 2018
Your Relationship Questions, Answered.Today, we're answering your relationship questions in order to give you real help for your relationship. Here are some of the relationship questions I'm answering today: Ms M asks, "How do I know whether my relationship is worth saving, or if I should let this go and move on?" Lisa asks: "Should I stay friends with my Ex?" Mr. T asks: "I'm shutting down with my partner. How do I stop?" Ms. K asks: "I'm afraid that my boyfriend is emotionally unavailable due to his own issues. What do I do?" I mentioned many resources and links in this episode. Get access to all of them on the post for this show: https://wp.me/p6UUlQ-dmt Do you have relationship advice for these questioners or personal experiences that you can relate? Perhaps you have your own relationship questions, self-improvement questions, breakup questions, or career questions for an upcoming episode of The Love, Happiness and Success Podcast? If so, please leave them in the comments! All the best,
Direct download: Relationship_Advice_-_Relationship_Questions_-_Relationship_Help_-_42318_2.41_PM.mp3
Category:Relationship Advice, Personal Growth, Self-Improvement -- posted at: 3:43pm MDT |
Mon, 9 April 2018
How To Improve Self EsteemHow do you feel about yourself? Are you confident in your power to make good things happen in your life? Too many people go through periods in their lives where self-confidence feels elusive. They doubt themselves. They may feel "less than" others around them. Perhaps they don't ask for what they deserve or don't feel able to take the risks that will move them forward. And as a result, they may settle for less in their relationships, their careers, and their lives. Self-esteem matters. Self-Esteem, Self-Confidence, and Self-WorthFeeling good about yourself (not in a narcissistic way, but rather in a healthy, self-accepting way) is key to having a good life. Yet many people struggle with this, and it is something that we routinely address with our therapy and life coaching clients. So, to help you cultivate healthy confidence in your own life, on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I'm joined by two of my colleagues, Anastacia Sams, M.A., LMFTC and Kathleen Stutts, M.Ed., LPCC, both of whom are experts in helping people heal, grow, and restore their optimism about themselves. We're talking about how to improve your self-esteem, how to create self-confidence, how to cultivate healthy self-worth, and most importantly, how to use the healing power of self-acceptance to (paradoxically) create real and lasting change in your life. We hope this exploration helps YOU on your path of growth and healing, too.
Direct download: How_to_Improve_Your_Self_Esteem.mp3
Category:Self Improvement -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Tue, 27 March 2018
Dating Coaches Get Real.Yes, modern dating can be challenging. For as constantly-connected as we all are digitally, it can still be hard to establish a genuine connection with someone new — let alone someone who's a good match for you. Whether you've been doing online dating, or spending lots of time out and about chatting up attractive strangers you know that dating in this day and age can be daunting. And... I also want you to know that dating, with intention, courage and strategy, also works. There are many great people out there, just like you, who are looking for love — and finding it. Modern dating can and does lead to love. But there are questions about dating that need to be answered first. Namely, what's the difference between the type of people that modern dating seems to work for, and those for whom love is always elusive? What are the changes that you need to make in your dating approach to get better results? So Why Am I Still Single?To get to the bottom of this, I've asked the person who understands the realities of modern dating better than anyone: Brian Howie, to join me on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. Brian is the founder, host and agent provocateur of The Great Love Debate. All over the world, Brian has been amassing single men and women together in the same room (often with some relationship and dating experts thrown in) and then sparking passionate conversations between them all about what is either leading to (or getting in the way of) love and connection. Through these debates, Brian has gained a unique perspective into modern dating as well as a remarkable insight into the specific things that both men and women are unintentionally doing that either sabotage their chances of creating a meaningful new relationship.... or lead them into the arms of "the one." Listen to his expert advice, on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast.
xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Why_Are_You_Still_Single_-_32718_12.40_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships, Dating -- posted at: 1:09pm MDT |
Mon, 12 March 2018
Do Long Distance Relationships Work?Oh yes. In fact, long-distance relationships can have strengths over in-person relationships, and be a wonderful experience for everyone involved. However, to have a successful long-distance relationship, you need to be mindful of a few key factors in order to help you both feel loved, secure and connected although the miles keep you apart. To talk all about how to make long distance relationships work, I've enlisted the support of long-distance relationship expert Brogan Crosby, M.S., LMFTC. We're talking about:
Listen to this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, and learn how to make your long-distance relationship thrive. All the best,
Direct download: How_to_Make_Long_Distance_Work_-_31218_7.00_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships -- posted at: 7:08pm MDT |
Mon, 26 February 2018
There are false myths about men that are unhelpful to everyone; themselves, the people who love them, and their relationships. So on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, our mission is to understand men and "the male experience," especially when it comes to self-development. To this end, I've enlisted the support of my fellow couples counselors, therapists and life coaches, Zachary Gaiter, and Seth Bender Here are just some of the questions about men we're discussing:
All here for you, on today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Understanding_Men.mp3
Category:Mental Health, Self Improvement, Relationships -- posted at: 4:04pm MDT |
Mon, 12 February 2018
Ghosts, Zombies and Breadcrumbs, Oh My!If you've been on the modern dating scene for any time at all, you've probably become aware that the way people connect with each other is changing. Old "rules of dating" that we could once take for granted are no longer the norm. In fact, dating advice from just a few years ago might now steer you in the wrong direction if you're looking for love. On this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm joined by Match.com's lead researcher and scientific advisor Dr. Helen Fisher, as well as Denver dating coach Markie Keelan, to talk about their latest dating advice and how you can make it work for you. Here are just some of the dating questions we're discussing:
All for you, on this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast.
Direct download: New_Rules_For_Dating_-_Dr_Helen_Fisher_-_21218_5.39_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships -- posted at: 12:57pm MDT |
Mon, 29 January 2018
How Do You Get Over An Affair?I know it sounds hard to believe, but you can heal after infidelity, and stay together. You may not ever "get over" an affair, but you can certainly heal your relationship. It is also possible to rebuild the trust after infidelity. However.... getting past infidelity is an active process, for both partners. Time alone does not heal an affair. You cannot just "get over" infidelity. After you've been betrayed, you can't just flip a switch and put the past in the past, and trust your partner again. But you can heal, and you can trust again... when you're both doing the work of recovery, together. Real Advice For Rebuilding Trust and Security, After An AffairOn this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I'm sharing the ten crucial steps that every couple must take in order to repair their relationship after infidelity. I hope that this discussion creates a road-map for you to follow, as you work to reclaim your relationship, your trust, and your sense of security after an affair. With love and respect, |
Mon, 15 January 2018
Getting Over HeartbreakFor years now, it's been a personal passion of mine to help people recover from heartbreak. I know that when you're going through a bad breakup or divorce, it can be absolutely overwhelming emotionally. Most people describe feeling "obsessed" with matters related to their breakup: Thinking about their Ex, or plagued with incessant thoughts about what went wrong in their relationship, why the breakup happened, what it means about them, and — most importantly — when they'll ever feel better. For many people dealing with heartbreak, the unanswered questions, or confusion about what to do in different situations, are on their minds constantly. I get many questions from people in the process of trying to get over heartbreak, and I thought I'd take the opportunity to answer some of them today on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. We'll be talking through the following breakup questions:
Listen now to get some advice for how to cope with a breakup, get your confidence and self esteem back, start feeling like yourself again. If YOU have a question for an upcoming episode of the podcast, you can leave it in the comments section of this post, or call 720-433-1110 to leave me a voicemail that I may use on an upcoming episode. In the meantime, take care... P.S. Did you know that I host a free, online breakup support group on Facebook? This is not a therapy group, but simply a space for you to connect with other people going through a painful breakup. Breakups can be so isolating, but you don't have to go through this alone. This group is a secret, private group, so no one can see that you're a member except other members, and your posts will only be viewable to the group. If you'd like to join, please message me via Facebook, and we'll add you to the group.
Direct download: Dealing_With_Heartbreak-_Breakup_Questions_Jan_2018_-_11518_7.08_AM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Breakups, Divorce, Relationships -- posted at: 7:56am MDT |
Mon, 1 January 2018
How to Stop Self-Sabotage From Derailing Your Goals. Do you ever feel like your own worst enemy? Or feel frustrated that, despite having the best of intentions, you can't seem to actualize your goals? What I've learned from many years as a life coach and therapist is that when people fail it is NOT because of lack of motivation, or determination, or willpower. Most of the time it is because people are unintentionally sabotaging their own success... from day one.The worst part is that they usually have no idea that they're even doing it. The antidote is having awareness about the subtle forces that will pull you off track every time, and the practices that will help you stay on course. Using the six strategies I'll be teaching you about on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast will help you stop unintentionally sabotaging your success, and set you up to achieve your most important goals in 2018. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Are_You_Sabotaging_Your_Success_-_1118_12.56_PM.mp3
Category:Sel-Help -- posted at: 1:32pm MDT |
Mon, 18 December 2017
It's Time To Stretch Your SoulThis is a sacred time of year, no matter what your beliefs. Spiritual traditions of every flavor honor this special season. Even if you have no spiritual belief system it's still a time for reflection, generosity and new resolutions. It's a time of year for gratitude, showing others how much you love them, and thinking about who you want to grow into as the next year spins into focus -- for everyone. It's also the perfect time to cultivate the practice of unconditional love. In the near future, you will likely have fork-in-the-road moments with friends, family, your kids, siblings, and your partner, in all their disappointing, annoying, frustrating, and hurtful humanity. At these moments you can choose judgment or empathy; contempt or compassion; anger or acceptance; grudge-holding or forgiveness. Its easy to love when your ego is stroked, when you feel gratified, and when you're awash in pleasurable "loving" feelings. But the heart of every religion teaches us that our purpose here is something else: To love when it’s hard. It can be challenging to stay compassionate and understanding with people who behave badly. The grand, beautiful paradox of this time of year is that -- with all it's unique stressors -- you will have many opportunities to practice staying soft and loving in the face of challenging relational moments. Accept the Challenge of Unconditional LoveChoosing love even when it's hard feels selfless, but truthfully, you're the one who wins. Choosing love expands your soul, softens your spirit, and makes you a happier person. In giving love, you receive it -- whether or not anyone else participates. Learning how to do this will not only help others, make you feel good, improve your relationships, and contribute to world peace... it will help you grow into the self-actualized, "best self" that you were meant to be. With love to you, The Season For Unconditional Love: Listen NowMusic Credits: The Kronos Quartet, Black Angels: "Spem in Alium"
P.S. Are you on the Love, Happiness and Success Express? Sign up on my website and I'll send you a monthly roundup with the latest from the blog.
Direct download: The_Season_For_Unconditional_Love_.mp3
Category:relationships, self help -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 11 December 2017
What to Do, When The Dark Season Brings Dark EmotionsIn the months leading up to the holidays, and in the months after, many people struggle with "dark emotions" such as depression, grief, and sadness. There are many reasons for this, including the reality of Seasonal Affective Disorder, changes to many people's health and nutrition habits in the wintertime, and the fact that for many people the holiday season often brings with it unique stressors and emotional triggers. Many people dealing with hard life transitions like a breakup or divorce struggle during their first holiday alone. For others, bittersweet memories of years past and lost loved ones infuse the season with feelings of grief and loss. All these experiences are normal, and natural. Many, many people are dealing with these feelings privately as they go through the motions of making merry. However, because these extremely common feelings are not often discussed publicly, many people experiencing them can feel isolated as a result. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, we're breaking the silence and talking openly about this common experience, and how to move past it. We'll be discussing how to deal with dark emotions in a healthy way: when to lean into painful feelings, and how to work through them productively. We'll talk about the difference between situational depression and the symptoms of major depressive disorder, how to get a handle on seasonal affective disorder, how to work through the stages of grief, and the natural remedies for depression that can help you feel healthier and happier. Wishing you all the best on your journey of growth and healing,
Direct download: Dealing_With_Dark_Emotions_-_121117_6.49_AM.mp3
Category:Self Help -- posted at: 6:59am MDT |
Mon, 4 December 2017
Start the New Year Strong, and InspiredAs a life coach who specializes in helping people grow and make positive changes in their lives, I'm well aware that every new year brings with it a wonderful opportunity to take stock of your life, get connected with your core values, get re-focused on your goals, and craft a plan to achieve them. Most people have a renewed sense of hope and motivation around their New Year's resolutions, which — when given the right tools — increases their chances of being successful in achieving big, positive changes. But it can be hard to set (much less achieve) your New Year's goals. Many times people make New Year's resolution lists that are not tied to their deepest values, meaning they list the things they think they should want — or that other people want them to do. These are never successful, because they're not tied to your authentic wants and needs. Other times, people do have clarity about what they want to achieve, but their "grand plans" fall apart because their aspirations are not tied to a concrete, doable action plan. But neither of those sad fates will happen to you. Because today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast is all about supporting you in your New Year's resolutions success. I'll be walking you through my "Start Your New Year Strong" free mini life coaching session so that YOU can get clarity about what you want for yourself over this next year, and also make a concrete plan for how to create it. Note: This is an "active" podcast meaning that I'll be walking you through some exercises to gain self awareness and make specific plans. Before you start listening, please click on this link to download the free pdf worksheet so that you can do these exercises with me today. You Have The Power to Make Amazing Things Happen in Your LifeI'm excited to share this activity with you. My hope is that you'll leave our time together feeling inspired, energized, and with some tools and concrete new strategies to help you make great things happen for yourself in 2018. With love and respect,
Direct download: New_years_resolutions_goals_2017-18_-_12417_11.34_AM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Self Esteem, Productivity -- posted at: 12:18pm MDT |
Mon, 20 November 2017
How To Handle Challenging Relationships Over the HolidaysAhoy there! As I'm sure you're well aware, the holidays are fast approaching. If you're like many (most?) of our life coaching, therapy, and marriage counseling clients, over the past few weeks you've probably had lots of questions on your mind about how to handle this time of year - especially when it comes to managing your most important family relationships. While family holidays have the potential to be fun and meaningful opportunities for connection, they can also be fraught with delicate and/or infuriating interpersonal dilemmas for many people. You want to have close relationships with your family or in-laws, and at the same time, it can feel very challenging to navigate the high-intensity holiday season without your family pushing your buttons, and firing off your emotional triggers. Because of having had bad experiences in holidays past, many people can spend weeks, if not months, leading up to the holidays in a state of "holiday anxiety." We have had a number of thoughtful and heartfelt questions come in recently from our listeners, readers, and clients about how to handle various relationship situations over the holidays. As a little holiday "care package" for them and for you, I'll be putting on my family therapist hat and addressing them on today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. Here are some of the questions our listeners (and clients) have been asking lately. I chose these questions in particular because I think that so many people can relate to them... Grandparents Not Respecting Parents"Dr. Lisa, I love my husband's family. They are so kind, and generous with us. At the same time, I feel that they do not respect our (especially my) authority as parents. In our home we have expectations for our kid's behavior, and also set limits around things like junk food. I feel that my husband's parents disregard these completely, even when we directly ask them to. The grandparents are overstepping boundaries. In particular, my mother in law is controlling and overbearing. It doesn't matter what I say or how I feel. My husband tells me that it's just the way she is and to go along with it. But I am so frustrated when I'm around her. I need him to set boundaries with his family and he won't. I need to be setting boundaries for grandparents. We are going to be staying with them for a week. Help!" How Do I Deal With My Judgmental Family"How do I deal with nosy questions? Even if they are well-meaning, I feel like my family does not get me at all, and like they're always judging me and my choices." Spending Christmas Alone After Divorce"This is my first holiday after my divorce, and I feel really sad. All I can think about are holidays I had with my Ex. My friends are busy with their families. I feel lonely. I think I am starting to get "holiday depression" over it. What do I do?" Toxic Parents: Do I Avoid My Family Over the Holidays?"I want to have a good relationship with my family, but over the years I have become aware that I have toxic parents. I believe they may even be narcissistic parents. Both of my parents are critical and judgmental of me. My mother can literally be abusive towards me. She is also completely codependent. I have dealt with it in the past by avoiding family gatherings, and avoiding my family during the holidays. My friends have told me I should cut off family entirely, and honestly I have considered cutting family out of my life. I don't want to do that, but I don't know what else to do to protect myself from my toxic family." Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents"My parents are the nicest people ever but they drive me crazy. My mom is constantly complaining about her health, and then I watch her sit on her butt all day and eat junk food. She is seriously overweight, has high blood pressure, is pre-diabetic, and will not do anything about it. My father constantly interrupts people. He drinks too much. He talks with his mouth full. My parents are not in a great place financially, and spend way too much money on our kids during the holidays and they make bad financial choices in general. I am literally embarassed by my parents. I want to help them but when I say anything they shut me down. All my "holiday stress" is tied to my frustrating family. How do I deal with this?" I answer all these questions on today's podcast. Listen, and get some advice for how to manage all of these challenging family situations with love, compassion, tolerance and strength. Do you have follow up questions for me? Or comments? Please share them on the blog! All the best, P.S. Here's a link if you want to check out one of the resources discussed on today's show. Crucial Conversations; Tools For Talking When the Stakes Are High, by Patterson, Grenny, McMillan & Switzler
Direct download: Family_Relationships_Over_the_Holidays_-_112017_1.36_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships, Family, Holidays -- posted at: 2:10pm MDT |
Tue, 7 November 2017
Single During the Holidays?As a breakup expert and dating coach, I know all too well that many single people — particularly newly single people — often dread the holiday season, envisioning themselves enduring the upcoming string of holiday celebrations without a +1. But truly, there is no need to worry about feeling lonely during the holidays. If you're single, and want to be in a new relationship, the holiday season is actually a fantastic, highly advantageous time for you to connect with a new love. Why is dating during the holidays such a great time to launch a beautiful new relationship? Three main reasons: 1. You have the opportunity to meet more people in person, because of all the holiday gatherings and events happening at this time of year. 2. Many, many other singles (fun, beautiful, desirable, successful singles just like you) are also feeling motivated to connect right now and are putting themselves out there too. But there's more: Match.com consistently finds that the Sunday after New Year's is the single most popular day for people to create new online dating profiles. They see a 30-40% increase in their membership on that one day alone. If you get your act together now, you'll have the pick of the litter come January. 3. Possibly most importantly, you have a legitimate reason to wear sequins, sparkles, and / or hilariously ugly holiday sweaters. (All of which are fantastic conversation starters, making it extremely easy for anyone to start up a conversation with you.) You could totally walk up to this guy and talk to him about his bells and puff-balls. Or maybe just give him a hug. In short: If you've been sitting on the sidelines, feeling discouraged about the dating game, now's the time to get off the bench and take another swing at finding love. And today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast is going to help you do just that. Free Advice From a Dating CoachThere are just a few keys to successful dating: Clarity, Chemistry, Connection, and Evaluation. We're going to be talking about each of these today to get you prepared to be your best self as you head into this sparkling season, ripe with potential for new love. I'll be putting on my "dating coach" hat to give you some advice on how to get clear about who you want to meet, and how to attract them. We'll also be discussing the all-important "chemistry factor" and what YOU need to be thinking about and doing to wow all the attractive new people you're about to meet, and leave them wanting more of you. Additionally, we'll be talking about how to make the most of all your opportunities for connection. You'll have natural "IRL" opportunties this season, in the form of parties and holiday events, as well as the chance to freshen up your online dating profile. Because your photos will make-or-break your success with online dating, I've invited professional portrait photographer Kelly Weaver (who specializes in online dating profile photos) to give you her top tips for getting some fantastic new photos for your profile. After that, we'll also be discussing the downsides of being so gorgeous and irresistible, which is how to competently handle all the attention you're getting — not to mention the sheer volume of messages and invitations you might be flooded with. No really, having a solid plan in place to manage all the back-and-forth without acquiring a bunch of pen-pals, and quickly figure out who's a good fit for you and who's not will help you focus your energy on the people who are a match for you. Lot's to learn about dating during the holidays, on this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. Listen now... xo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Ps: Do you have a follow up question or comment related to this podcast? Join the conversation!
Direct download: Dating_During_The_Holidays-_Tis_the_Season..._of_Love._-_11717_2.21_PM.mp3
Category:Dating, Relationships -- posted at: 3:08pm MDT |
Mon, 9 October 2017
How to Cope, in a World Where Bad Things HappenLike so many of you, I too was shocked and horrified by the events of last week when so many innocent lives were taken in the Las Vegas shooting. Among other things, it led me to scrap last Monday's podcast plans and create this one for you instead: Some advice for how to deal mentally and emotionally when terrible things happen. I hate it that we live in a world where this even needs to be addressed, but it does. Together, over the past years, we've been through so much. Shootings. Natural disasters. Terrorist Attacks. War. Human Suffering. In our day-to-day lives we're all under assault; choking down an endless barrage of information about all the latest horrors ... but with no guidance for how to cope with it all, emotionally.
Our counseling and coaching clients here at Growing Self have the luxury of being able to process all of it, and get actionable advice for how to manage the grief, the fear, and the anger. And most importantly, our clients have support in channeling all those dark feelings into something positive and empowering. I believe that you deserve the same. So today, on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I thought I'd offer you some of the same ideas we've been teaching our private clients lately about how to cope, during these dark times. Listen now, and learn:
Theses ideas help me personally, they help our clients, and I sincerely hope that they help you, too. With love and respect,
Direct download: How_to_Feel_Safe_in_a_Scary_World_-_10917_3.18_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Anxiety, Emotions -- posted at: 3:48pm MDT |
Mon, 28 August 2017
Do you attract the wrong people? Do you keep having toxic relationships?If so, you're not alone. You'd be surprised at how many people come to us for life coaching, breakup recovery, individual therapy, or dating coaching hoping to achieve one goal: Having a healthy relationship. (And how to stop getting involved in unhealthy ones). They show up to therapy or life coaching because they have, over time (or after the latest heartbreaking breakup) become aware that they are engaging in "non-ideal relationship patterns," over and over again. They keep getting involved with narcissists, or people who treat them badly. They keep choosing emotionally unavailable men, or aggressive / controlling women. Whatever the sad pattern is, they want it to stop. Above all else, they want to work on themselves to heal, grow, and ensure that NEXT time they get involved with someone they can love and be loved in a healthy relationship with a good person. And so we dig in. Identifying Your Blind SpotsThe first stop in figuring out why you keep choosing the wrong man or wrong woman is uncovering what unconscious motivations are driving your choices. Getting outside help in understanding your toxic relationship patterns can be a wise move, because of the entirely subconscious nature of the problem. You don't consciously choose bad relationships -- no one does. You choose what feel in the moment, are good relationships.... and then wind up having bad experiences. (That are often mysteriously, eerily similar to the past experiences you thought you were trying to avoid). Unhealthy relationship patterns can happen for many reasons. Sometimes it's old, unfinished emotional business from the past. Other times, your self-esteem or feelings of self-worth can get in the way. Yet other times, the root of the problem is imbedded in way you communicate or set boundaries with others. Because you are a complex, unique, individual, your truth will not be exactly the same as everyone else's. Avoiding Toxic RelationshipsHowever, there is one very common thing that most people have done at least once, and which will almost always lead to heartbreak: Falling victim to "Black Hat Love." Learning how to spot the one fatal factor that makes you most vulnerable to getting involved in toxic relationships can help you stop the madness, and finally create the happy, healthy relationship you're longing for. And that's what I'll be teaching you about on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. Have follow up questions for me? Leave them in the comments @ https://wp.me/p6UUlQ-92A xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Why_You_Keep_Falling_in_Love_With_The_Wrong_Person_-_82817_5.11_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships -- posted at: 5:32pm MDT |
Tue, 15 August 2017
Did you know that opposites really do attract - but only sometimes? Do you know what love has in common with addiction? Or how anti-depressants can interfere with your relationships? Or the difference between love and attachment? How about the kinds of personality combinations that create lasting love, versus lots of conflict? I didn't either, until I discovered the research of Dr. Helen Fisher. Through decades of research as a biological anthropologist, Dr. Fisher has uncovered the ancient secrets of love. Her groundbreaking work has revealed just how old, powerful, and biologically-based romantic love is through brain-image scanning. For example, the drive for love lives in the same part of your brain as the drive for water and warmth. You know how, when you've been in love, it's totally consumed you? You're not imagining it: She's shown that your brain is actually wired that way. There's more: Through her work with Match.com and Chemistry.com Dr. Fisher has collected data from literally millions of people, and shown how your biologically based personality style determines your ideal lover. She has also helped us understand the biological basis of sex and love addiction, and the mechanisms at work in love, lust, and attachment. She's given TED talks, written books, published articles in peer-reviewed journals: And now she's here talking to you, on the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. Listen now, and learn the truth about love from the expert: Dr. Helen Fisher. All the best,
Direct download: Understanding_Romantic_Love_From_The_Inside_Out.mp3
Category:Relationship Advice, Help For Your Marriage, Self Help, Evidence Based Therapy -- posted at: 7:00am MDT |
Tue, 1 August 2017
It's Time to Grow.Many people think that the most natural time to make big changes to their lives is around the New Year. Many people flock to life coaching around then, to help them actualize their resolutions. But, as a life coach, I'm going to let you in on a little-known secret: While the turn of the year is certainly a poetic time for transitions, there's actually one that's more powerful and effective if you really want to make change in your life. And that time is now. Why? Think about it: For all of your formative years, your life had a natural rhythm built around the school year. Summer was a time of self discovery and expansion. You got to step out of the daily grind for a little while, have new experiences, focus on relationships, and generally relax. Then as every new school year began, you had a new opportunity, and a new beginning. Your clothing and school supplies were freshened. Plans were made. Intentions were set. And you got clean slate on which to reinvent yourself, define your new identity, and create a different reality with each passing year. And most years, you succeeded, didn't you? You moved forward. You grew and changed. You were able to manifest a new incarnation of yourself. Every year was a chapter in the ever-evolving story of you. This cycle was repeated over and over and over from the time you were a small child, until well into your twenties and beyond. Our work and vacation seasons still follow this natural order. If you're a parent, you're reliving something similar with your children now. This natural cycle of growth and regeneration is now pretty much hard-wired into your system -- even if you're not in school anymore. However, many adults are no longer consciously aware of the ebb and flow of this seasonal growth energy in their lives. They just move from season to season without thinking too much about it. Sadly, they miss the opportunity for reflection transformation that this time of year affords. But today I'm here to help you learn how to through fully and intentionally harness the power of this special time, and take advantage of it. By deliberately using the psychological and emotional forces that become available to you during this unique time of year, you can make important and lasting change in your life. On this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'll be walking you through some new ideas and activities that will help you give your entire life a makeover. To start, you'll learn how to begin the process of shedding the old, and embracing the new. We'll cover how to de-clutter and re-organize your relationships, your habits, the way you're managing your time, your energy, and yourself. You'll learn how to take stock of different areas of your life to figure out what's working for you, what's worth building on, and what it's time to release. I'll give you some strategies to help you reflect and gain self awareness around the thoughts, feelings and behaviors that need to be released. Then we'll talk about how to craft a plan for this chapter of your life, that includes setting the goals and making the daily changes that will help you create the life you want. You deserve all the love, happiness and success in the world, and I sincerely hope that these ideas help you create it. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.growingself.com
Direct download: Makeover_your_life_-_8117_4.03_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Self Esteem, Productivity -- posted at: 5:00pm MDT |
Tue, 18 July 2017
Looking for free relationship advice from a marriage counselor? Here it is...Everyone needs relationship advice sometimes, and it can be hard to know where to go for trustworthy advice that will help you repair your relationship. (Sadly, much of what you find online is not evidence-based). One of the most meaningful things I do in my role here as a marriage counselor and relationship coach is putting lots of free information out into the world, in hopes that it connects with you at your time of need. Today, I'm making a show of it. Literally. I have people from all over the world get in touch with me, asking fantastic (and heartfelt) relationship questions. I want you to know and I get all these questions. I've been listening to you, and hearing what you're looking for help with. Today, I'm here with answers. I've picked a handful of a few of the most frequent types of relationship questions I commonly hear, and am addressing them personally on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast. On today's show I'm dishing out some real relationship advice that answers listener questions, like:
I bet you can relate to some of these, and if so I hope that my perspective finds the two of you help you find your way back together again. Do you have a question for an upcoming episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast? Leave it in the comments of this episode -- I might use them on a "Relationship Questions, Round 2" podcast soon! xoxo, www.growingself.com
Direct download: Relationship_Questions_Answered_-_71817_4.41_PM.mp3
Category:Relationship Advice -- posted at: 4:50pm MDT |
Mon, 3 July 2017
Do you compare your life and your accomplishments to those of other people?In this day and age it's harder than ever to trust your own ideas, believe in yourself, and actualize a self-directed vision. Why? There are many forces at work in our culture that make us question whether we're measuring up. Not least of these is our consumption of social media -- the never-ending digital conveyor belt of information about all the amazing things our friends and acquaintances are doing with their lives, in vivid color. Vacations, milestones, weddings, births, and promotions are artfully showcased to enviable perfection. When you're constantly confronted with semi-histrionic proclamations about the magnificence of what other people are doing, your own life can feel less-than in comparison. (Listen to "Schadenfacebook" on The Hidden Brain Podcast.) But when you're measuring yourself by someone else's yardstick, it takes a toll. For starters, it creates anxiety and insecurity. It can also lead you to begin crafting your life to garner the approval and admiration of others. When that happens, you become disconnected from your vision, your truth, and your personal power. When the positive affirmation of other people starts to feel really important, it can lead to a downward spiral in your feelings of intrinsic self worth. What Happens When You Lose YourselfBecoming overly focused on how you compare to others makes you vulnerable to all sorts of problems. For example, you might find it increasingly hard to make decisions without second guessing yourself. It can feel hard to persist in the face of adversity when you're not certain about who you are, and what you want. When you need people to treat you a certain way so that you can feel okay about yourself, your relationships can suffer. You may feel increasingly out of touch with who you are, and what makes you authentically happy. Worst yet, being other-focused may lead you to (ironically) become less able to create the kind of successful life you want... leading to even more anxiety and dissatisfaction with your current reality, and more dependent on the opinions of others to feel okay about yourself. (Check out "Why Gen Y Millenials Are So Unhappy" on the Wait But Why blog.) Here's a poignant note on exactly this subject that I recently received from a listener of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast: "Dear Dr. Lisa, Recently I am trying to consciously make time to work on building cognitive skills and self awareness with the tips and lessons you share in your classes, blogs and podcasts, and also from feedback I get from [the coach I'm working with @ Growing Self.] [Through my personal growth work] I found out that one of my unhealthy thinking habits is "comparing myself with others". I was comparing myself with my boyfriend, my friends, and this was so on "auto-pilot" most of the time, I wasn't even so aware about it. Since I could always easily find what I was lacking when I did comparisons, it brought me many problems. I was always lacking confidence, I was always seeing proof of my shortcomings and reasons about why I shouldn't/counldn't do something, and I always struggled with anxiety and uneasiness. It was most painful when I felt inferior than others in things I value most. (Being compassionate, intelligent etc.) Also, I realized that deep in my mind I used comparisons to feel good about myself, like comparing my achievements to others' and assuring myself that I'm doing great, which is maybe not so bad and what people naturally do, but it could make me feel guilty or empty at times. I was in this unhealthy, unhelpful place for a very long time. I'm still working on this, but I felt very liberated after I learned that these unhelpful thinking patterns can be shifted with effort to more productive ones, and that people have different natural talents and strengths and it's okay to accept myself as who I am. It was almost a surprise to know that there is actually a way to be happier. I would be interested if you could do a podcast or write an article about comparisons someday, if you have anything to share about this topic." Sincerely, How to Stop Comparing Yourself To Others, and Start Believing in YourselfOh yes, dear H, I do. I have quite a lot to share on this topic, actually. In my day-to-day role as a therapist and life coach here at Growing Self, I talk to many, many people who express the same anxiety and heartache that you expressed in your letter. You would not believe how many gorgeous, healthy, blazingly intelligent, high achieving and objectively successful people feel the same way about themselves and their lives. No matter what they do, they harbor gnawing anxiety that it's not enough. Their accomplishments are quickly disregarded in favor of the next amazing thing they should be doing. Their feelings about themselves rise and fall based on what others think of them. And when they do experience inevitable disappointments and setbacks, they are vulnerable to depression. Not fun. So on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm going to be tackling this subject. We're going to be talking all about the insidious emotional toll comparing yourself to others can take, and how to combat it by learning how to believe in yourself instead. We'll be talking about how to affirm yourself, trust in yourself, strengthen yourself, develop your self awareness, plug holes in your vulnerabilities, and be empowered to create a life that is genuinely meaningful and satisfying to you. Today's journey will begin by a little rock history lesson, featuring a band called Death. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Stop_Comparing_Yourself_to_Others..._And_Start_Trusting_Yourself_-_7317_2.23_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help -- posted at: 2:30pm MDT |
Mon, 5 June 2017
Feeling stuck? Here's How to Break Free...Most people who want more out of life seek out counseling or coaching because they are not willing to settle. They want to make a positive change in their lives, their careers, in their relationships, or in themselves, but have run out of ideas. They have tried everything that they, personally, know how to do to improve the situation... and it hasn't worked. They feel stuck. If you've been feeling this way lately, I want you to know that 1) you're not alone, and that 2) I'm going to help you with this. Like right now. Here's the big secret to getting unstuck: Self awareness. What nobody realizes, before entering personal growth work, is that "the problem" they've been trying to fix is not actually what needs their attention. Focusing on the circumstance, or the situation, is not going to move the needle for you. The answer is not outside. It's inside. Only when you identify the unconscious, inner obstacles that have been getting in your way will you start to move meaningfully forward. Until that happens, you'll spin. (And seethe. And beat yourself up. And get increasingly frustrated.) As frustrating and uncomfortable as this stuck place is, can be it's really an amazing opportunity in disguise. Why? Because it's often feeling ABSOLUTELY FED UP WITH STUCK-NESS that launches people into the life-changing journey of growth and soul-expansion that would not have been possible otherwise. Often, this journey carries people through places inside themselves that they'd never even imagined existed. As people move towards empowerment, towards designing their lives, and towards "creating change" they often discover that the path is one of growth. Of personal evolution. Of compassion. Of self actualization. Sometimes, even one of healing. This is a beautiful experience and one I believe passionately that everyone deserves. So on this episode of The Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm actually going to give you a "Master Class" of the main ideas that all our counseling and coaching clients arrive upon, eventually: The path to creating change outside yourself starts from within. Only by uncovering the inner, hidden obstacles that have been holding you back will you be able to move forward and create meaningful and lasting change in your life, your career, your relationships... and in yourself. Self awareness is the first step of personal transformation. Only when you understand yourself, and the unconscious obstacles you've been wrestling with, can you make the changes that will actually help you break free. How to Cultivate Self Awareness:Step 1: Listen to the podcast to learn about the "four domains of stuck-ness" that people often get trapped by. See which resonates with you! Step 2: Click here to take the "What's Holding You Back" quiz to find out which of these domains is the most powerful in your life. Step 3: Then use your newfound self-awareness to take positive, and most importantly effective, action. Step 4: Share your experiences in the comments on http://www.growingself.com/break-free/ We all learn and grow from our connections with each other, after all... (I'll even go first). xo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Whats_Holding_You_Back_Podcast_-_6517_2.46_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Relationships, Life Coaching, Changing Habits -- posted at: 2:49pm MDT |
Tue, 16 May 2017
Do you have issues with your parents?If so, you're normal. As a therapist, family therapist, and life coach I know that many, if not most, people in their twenties, thirties, and forties are still working through different aspects of their relationships with their parents. This doesn't mean rehashing the past, but rather letting go of old baggage so that you can move forward into the life you design. Though this work can be challenging, it can also be absolutely necessary for you to re-define your relationships with your family of origin as you grow into your happiest, healthiest, "best self." Understanding how you relate/d to your family can also be profoundly important to understanding how you relate to your spouse and children. Sometimes, this work involves healing, and forgiving your parents for things that happened in the past. You may need to learn how to establish healthy adult relationships with your parents, as you create your own family. Or, you might need to set new boundaries with your parents, and release the responsibility and guilt your're carrying. It's a lot, and for many this type of work can feel very "big" and overwhelming. So on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I'm going to be talking you through some really common "parent problems" that adults face, and give you some tips for how to resolve them successfully. This episode might be helpful to you if you have:
Yes, these are deep topics, but ones I know that so many of you can relate to. I hope that the advice I share here can help you to not just create healthier and happier relationships with your parents, but can launch you on your own empowering journey of healing and growth. May peace be with you,
Direct download: How_to_Deal_With_Difficult_Parents_-_51617_6.19_AM.mp3
Category:relationships, self help -- posted at: 7:07am MDT |
Tue, 2 May 2017
Because You Don't Just Want to Get Married. You Want an Amazing Marriage.As I've written about (passionately!) in previous posts, there are specific things that smart couples do -- right from the start of their relationship -- to set themselves up for a happy, healthy, successful marriages. Step one? Relationship education. Regrettably, no one explicitly teaches you how to have good relationships. We all muddle through, learning from our mistakes, and breaking some things in the process. But your marriage is much to important to wander blindly through. The quality of your marriage is the center of the life you'll build. Don't take chances. Do it right. Believe it or not, there is actually an instruction manual! What we know from research is that couples who engage in high-quality marriage education programs either before they get married or in the first few years of marriage have much better outcomes than couples who don't: Lower divorce rates, higher marital satisfaction, and a stronger partnership. You can achieve this too, by investing in your relationship, and educating yourself. Why does this help? Because proactive couples on a positive trajectory who learn ahead of time how to handle inevitable issues, how to communicate, and how to keep their love alive prevent relationship problems from happening in the first place. Our Wedding Present to YouIf you are getting married this year (or even if you jumped the broom a few years ago) I am here today, to support YOU in creating an amazing, strong, enduring marriage by providing you with loads of free information. I want you to have everything you need to be happy and successful in your relationship for years to come! Specifically, today, I have two "marriage education" presents for you. Free Premarital Counseling AdviceThe first: I have enlisted the support of one of our resident premarital counseling experts, Meagan Terry, M.A., LMFT. Meagan is a licensed marriage and family therapist, an emotional intelligence and communication coach, trained by the federal reserve to do financial counseling with couples, AND she teaches our Lifetime of Love Premarital and Relationship Class. On this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast Meagan will be SPILLING THE BEANS about the kinds of skills and strategies couples need to learn to create a lifetime of love together. Listen to our interview and learn the kinds of things you and your sweetie can start doing now to ensure that your relationship stays strong. You'll also get some insight in to the skills and strategies she teaches her premarital couples to help them get on the same page around finances, sexuality, priorities, and more. Ask a Wedding ExpertThe second wedding present I have for you: We are co-hosting a super-fun happy hour event at our Denver office on Wednesday May the 10th called "Ask The Wedding Experts." If you are planning a wedding, this is your big chance to mix and mingle in a casual setting with wedding professionals (like master wedding planner Laura Peterson of L Elizabeth Events) who are ready to share their wisdom around things like:
This event is FREE. If you'd like to attend in person, register now so we know to save some champagne for you. And, because so many of our online premarital counseling clients are outside of Denver, you can still get the scoop. Email me with your questions, OR leave your questions as comments in this post. I will ask our panel of wedding experts your questions on your behalf, and I will post their answers for you in an upcoming blog post. Get your questions to me by 5/9, and then stay tuned for the answers! xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Make_or_Break_Your_Marriage-_Premarital_Counseling_-_5217_2.40_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships -- posted at: 4:39pm MDT |
Mon, 27 February 2017
Breakup Advice For The Most Common Breakup QuestionsThe only thing worse than going through a breakup or a divorce, in my opinion, is the mental and emotional fallout that comes after. Most people dealing with a split are consumed by unanswerable questions, replaying events in their minds, and trying to make sense of what happened. They also often worry about how they'll ever get over it... and when they'll stop feeling so terrible. Since I do so much work around breakup recovery I often have people get in touch with me with questions, and for help in dealing with a bad breakup. But I recently had a listener of my Love, Happiness and Success Podcast get in touch with me in the most unique way. She had read my book, "Exaholics: Breaking Your Addiction to An Ex Love" but had some additional questions about how to get over some of the most common (and frankly, hardest) aspects of breakup recovery. But instead of just emailing she recorded her questions into the sweetest video, and shared it with me. As I watched her ask her heartfelt questions it I thought of all the other people who were probably going through the exact same things. I got back in touch with her to see if it was okay to use her recording in an upcoming episode of the podcast so that my listeners (and YOU) could also benefit from hearing the answers. She was kind enough to let me share them, and today's podcast is the result. So if you're also going through a breakup and also wondering...
... you'll definitely want to tune into this episode of the Love, Happiness & Success Podcast. I hope our conversation helps you find your way towards growth and recovery too. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Breakup_Recovery-_Listener_Questions_-_22717_1.22_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Breakups, Divorce -- posted at: 2:11pm MDT |
Mon, 13 February 2017
What's the only thing better than free dating advice?? Evidence-Based Free Dating AdviceValentine's Day is once again upon us. If you're single and ready to meet your soul mate, I have a special present for you on this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast: Some fantastic evidence-based dating advice from relationship researcher, and Match.com scientific advisor Dr. Justin Garcia. Dr. Garcia, along with evolutionary biologist Dr. Helen Fisher, have just released their latest batch of research from their ongoing "Singles in America" research study. They have some fascinating new data about what singles are really looking for, what's most important to them, and what some of their biggest turn-off's are. His dating advice can help you seriously "up your game" when it comes to dating. No doubt modern dating can be challenging, but as with all things knowledge is power. If you educate yourself about the realities of the dating game, learn how to play up your most attractive qualities, and are mindful of the common dating mistakes that can turn people off you've already got a huge advantage. Random dating research tidbits that can make or break a first date:Did you know that 66% of all singles surveyed reported that having their date send a text while they were together was a major turn off? That number gets bumped up to 75% if you answer a call while you're out! And you won't even believe what your dates really think about your cracked phone screen... Listen to my interview with Dr. Garcia to learn:
You'll get great love advice and learn the easy things you can do (or even more importantly -- avoid doing!) to increase the odds that next Valentine's Day you'll be snuggling with your sweetie. If you'd like even more specific advice to help you master the art of modern dating, get instant access to our new "Find The One" online dating coaching program. xoxo, LMB
Direct download: Singles_in_America-_Dating_Advice_-_21317_12.34_PM.mp3
Category:Relationships, Dating -- posted at: 12:47pm MDT |
Mon, 2 January 2017
Free advice from a Life Coach:Did you know that making New Year's resolutions can actually get in the way of your making real and lasting change in your life?Today on the Love, Happiness & Success Podcast I'm putting on my Life Coach hat: I'm going to teach you a totally different way of thinking about "success" that will help you clarify your values, focus your energy on what's really important, and help you make massive progress towards the things you want most in life. Sounds bold, I know, but this is a system I use all the time with great results -- both with my clients, and myself. Today I'm going to be teaching it to you, too. (Psst. Have you subscribed to the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast yet? Subscribe to get the latest episodes in your feed, and while you're there leave a review!) New Year's Resolutions Don't WorkI felt compelled to share this to you because I know that you -- like all of us -- probably have high hopes for the coming year. And there's nothing worse than making big plans for change... only to feel like a "failure" before February even rears it's heart-spangled self. What we know from research (click here to review the Stanford study on New Year's resolutions) is that only 8% of Americans achieve their New Years resolutions. Pretty grim. That's 92% of people feeling like they missed the mark. So What Will Actually Help You Achieve Your Goals?In order to understand what will work, we have to first understand what traditional New Years resolutions are lacking, and why they fizzle fast. It's because even the most heartfelt resolutions are often disconnected from the things that will get you real results: Your values, your time, and your energy. It's one thing to set a goal. Goals are great, and give us a direction to move towards. But making things happen in your life is altogether different than "achieving goals." To hike up the tallest mountain, you have to stay on the path. The right path. If your only focus is the mountain peak, it's pretty easy to wander off into the bushes that are right in front of you. Here's A Simple System That Will Move You Forward, Meaningfully.This podcast is a New Year's gift to you. I'll be teaching you the system I use, and that I use with many of my clients to help them refocus, recenter, and kindle a motivational fire under them. It will help you not just start the New Year off on the right foot, but help you get on the right path for the long haul. And - FYI - If you happen to be reading this AFTER the New Year, that is great too. This approach is a life-skill that you can use any time of the year to get re-focused, re-centered, and re-energized. Walk through the activities any time you're feeling like you need to get back on track. Because I'm all about making things easy and effective I even made you a worksheet so that you can work along with me during the podcast, and do the activities I'll be walking you through. Get it through this link: www.growingself.com/start-strong. Learn more about any of the other tools, free information, online classes and programs I referenced on my website: www.growingself.com. All the best, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: start-2016-strong_-_1317_3.04_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help, Goals, Life Coaching, Achievement -- posted at: 10:00am MDT |
Mon, 12 December 2016
It's not "The Most Wonderful Time of The Year" when your heart is broken.Even if the holiday season usually delights you, it's hard to be cheerful when you're consumed by painful memories of holidays past. The first year post-breakup, or post-divorce, can be especially traumatic. Everything reminds you of your Ex, and the fact that you are not together anymore. Thinking about the ice skating rink that you held hands at last year, how you're going to explain this to your anxious Grandma, or even the sight of sparkling lights is enough to throw you into a heavy state of sadness. The holiday season can also feel particularly lonely if you're nursing a broken heart. Emotional pain feels isolating and difficult to share when it seems like everyone else is happy and having a good time. And of course the last thing you want to do is go to a party when 1) you need to fake cheerful "okay-ness" and / or 2) you're worried about running into your Ex or their friends. That's not even taking into consideration how challenging it is for the newly single to to negotiate high impact social situations without their usual "plus 1." In short: this time of year makes a hard situation feel even harder. If you're like most people in this position you probably have lots of questions: "How should I handle myself in certain situations?" "Should I even try to go to parties this year, or should I lay low?" "How do I take care of myself?" and "Will this loneliness and pain ever end?" Truthfully, the answers to those questions are not always easy or simple. The answers really depend on where you are in the breakup recovery process. On this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm going to walk you through the stages of healing after a breakup, and show you how to actually use the opportunity of this challenging time of year to move your "heartbreak healing process" forward more quickly. Not only will your "what to do" questions be answered, but you'll also get a good roadmap for the recovery process ahead. I hope that this information will help you invest in yourself, and make the coming year a fresh, positive new chapter of your life. All the best to you,
Direct download: How_To_Survive_a_Breakup_Over_the_Holidays_-_12716_7.59_AM.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:36pm MDT |
Tue, 15 November 2016
How to Cope With DisappointmentHaving your dream crushed can leave you sitting in emotional rubble, feeling disempowered and confused. Our disappointments have many faces: Causes, or candidates, you believe in get creamed. The most interesting first date you've had in a long time ghosts out. You realize that your partner is never actually going to change. The pink lines of the pregnancy test fade away, and the bleeding begins. Bad things happen to good people. People fail you. If you get in the ring of life, sooner or later, you're going to take a gut punch. So how do you keep going? We know that grit — the ability to get back up and continue plodding forward despite adversity — is the ultimate key to success. But It’s hard to maintain your hope and motivation when reality slams the door in your face. If you've suffered with disappointment lately, here are three ideas that can help, plus the one thing you should definitely avoid doing. I hope it helps you find peace, strengthen your resolve, and turn your face towards future. Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Coping_With_Disappointment_-_111516_8.14_PM.mp3
Category:Self Help -- posted at: 8:17pm MDT |
Wed, 2 November 2016
Overthinking: The Curse of the Most Creative and IntelligentReally smart, creative, and thoughtful people have many strengths. They can plan things in advance, avoid potential pitfalls, and envision their future reality. Vividly. However one thing I have learned from my years of experience as a therapist and life coach is that all these positive attributes, when left unsupervised, can also create boatloads of anxiety. Overthinking and Indecision = DisempowermentWhen you anticipate possible problems you feel constricted. When you plan every step you often encounter roadblocks. When you want to make the "right" decision before taking action, you invest more time and energy in to thinking than into doing. At these times it's easy to become riddled with uncertainty, and decide before you even try that things aren't even worth doing. Slam! Analysis paralysis has clamped down on your life, and stopped you from living courageously. The result? A safe life... But a smaller life. Authentic Happiness Requires RiskOne of the core skills of authentically happy people that I discuss at length in my online Happiness Class is the ability to take measured risks. Why is the ability to try new things related to happiness? Because when you take action to bring your life into alignment with your core values, it gets better. Another component of fearless living is being able to handle uncertainty or adversity with confidence and competence. That means your happiness is still intact, even when things go differently than you'd hoped. That's true resilience. Being resilient and trusting yourself means that it's safe to take chances. When you're able to fearlessly try new things, your world expands. When you give yourself permission to take action, you get to learn and grow no matter what. Not knowing exactly what is going to happen next adds sparkle and excitement to your life. When your life gets bigger and more interesting, so do you. Fearless Living Nourishes Your RelationshipFurthermore, novelty and learning new things are core ingredients to having a fresh, fun long term relationship. When your life atrophies, so does your partnership. If you want to have an interesting relationship, you need to have an interesting life. Plus, there is nothing sexier than a passionate person who is enthusiastic and confident. When you set aside anxieties and allow yourself to live fearlessly, you nourish both yourself and your relationship. 5 Steps to Stop Worrying and Start Living FearlesslyOn today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I'm giving you the scoop on how to release worry from your life, feel more confident in your decisions, strengthen your sense of competence and resilience, and cultivate fearlessness in your own life. Listen now, and learn all about the care and feeding of your inner tiger. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
Direct download: Stop_Worrying_and_Start_Living_Fearlessly_-_11216_7.15_AM.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:23am MDT |
Wed, 19 October 2016
Just because you don't feel good doesn't mean you are depressed."Dark emotions" are not just normal and healthy parts of life, they are also essential to personal growth. Feeling unhappy is often the catalyst for making positive changes in your life. There is light and dark in all things. Experiencing grief, sadness, disappointment, hurt, and regret - unpleasant though they may be - are part of being a whole person. Furthermore, listening to those hard feelings and taking guidance from them can help you understand yourself, your core needs, and your values more clearly. Even though they don't feel good in the moment, dark emotions are not just healthy... they are valuable. When you listen to those feelings instead of dismissing them as "bad," you have the chance to heal and grow. What is Depression?Depression is different from the pain of a "growth moment." Depression is not motivating, instructive or valuable. It's an illness. Depression is a mood state that impacts the way you think, feel, and behave. Unlike the dark emotions that are connected to growth opportunities, depression is not productive or constructive. In fact, depression can be a serious illness that needs to be treated and relieved before meaningful personal growth is possible. On today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm taking you inside depression, so you can understand what it is -- and what it is not. I'll help you identify the symptoms of depression in yourself or your loved one. Depression Management StrategiesWe'll also talk about what to do if you think you have depression so that you can create a practical strategy for conquering it. We'll talk about natural remedies for depression, cognitive behavioral therapy, and when medication for depression is the best idea. I'll also discuss what to do if you suspect that your partner or loved one is depressed, and how you can help them recover. Depression exists on a spectrum from mild to serious. One thing I discuss on the podcast is that when depression becomes very serious, it can become life threatening. Here are links to get emergency help if you or your loved one are in real trouble and need help immediately: Colorado Crisis Hotline: 1-844-493-8255 National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-8255 I hope this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast helps you identify what's going on in your life, and whether you're dealing with depression or a "growth opportunity." If you do believe that depression is gaining power in your life, I hope this discussion provides you with both hope (as depression is very treatable) as well as actionable steps you can start taking today. Lisa Marie Bobby |