#133 - The 9 Stages of a Breakup

Going through a breakup can feel like emotional whiplash. One day you’re angry, the next you’re crying, and somehow you still miss the person who hurt you. If you've ever wondered, “How much more healing do I have to do?” — this episode is for you. In this deep dive, I’m walking you through the stages of a breakup so you can understand what’s happening inside you, where you are in your healing, and get the clarity on what you need to do to move forward.

Breakup recovery isn’t linear — it’s layered, emotional, and sometimes messy. But when you understand the stage you’re in, you can take back your power and do the exact work your heart needs. Whether you’re still obsessing over your ex, stuck in grief, or wondering why you feel fine one minute and wrecked the next, this episode will help you normalize your experience and give you a clear roadmap to healing.

Timestamps:
00:00 – Why Breakup Recovery Matters
02:35 – Who I Am and Why I Care (More Than You Know)
05:30 – My Own Breakup Story (And Why It Shaped Everything)
07:58 – The Science Behind Breakup Recovery
17:23 – The 7 Stages of Healing (and Why They're Not Linear)
19:03 – Stage 1: Craving Contact with Your Ex
23:35 – Stage 2: Deciding It's Really Over
38:02 – Stage 3: The Grief Hits (Hard)
41:08 – Stage 4: Working Through Anger, Guilt & Shame
50:04 – Stage 5: How to Stop Thinking About Your Ex
52:03 – Stage 6: Learning from the Pain (Without Blaming Yourself)
57:14 – Stage 7: Trusting Yourself to Love Again
01:05:01 – What Healing Actually Looks Like
01:09:39 – Listener Q&A: Real Breakup Stories & Support

Navigating the 9 stages of a breakup can be an incredibly emotional and disorienting journey. But one thing is clear: there is a path forward and you don’t have to walk it by yourself. Here are a few resources to take the next step toward healing.

👉 Check out my free breakup recovery quiz: How Over Your Ex Are You?
It’s designed to help you understand what stage of healing you’re currently in, and more importantly, what you need to focus on to move forward. Whether you’re stuck in anger, bargaining, or detachment, this quiz offers personalized insights that can help you make sense of your emotions and gain clarity on what comes next.

If you're ready to talk to someone who truly understands what you're going through and can help you move forward, we’re here for you. Our team at Growing Self specializes in helping people heal from heartbreak—not just to feel better, but to grow into stronger, wiser, more empowered versions of themselves.

👉 Schedule a free consultation with one of the expert counselors or coaches on our team. This isn’t just about moving on—it’s about creating your new beginning. 

Xoxo
Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby
www.growingself.com

P.S. Know someone who’s going through it right now? Share this article with a friend who could use some clarity, comfort, and hope. You never know how much a simple message can help someone feel less alone.